#top ten questions science still can’t answer
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somebluemelodies · 1 year ago
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i think a lot about the fact that some of the hardest, most emotional, or sweetest lines i’ve ever heard come from a block game roleplay
like you’re telling me i just got absolutely emotionally obliterated by a bunch of squares and rectangles ??? my heart just melted bc of fictional (gay) cubitos ??? insanity
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nishayuro · 1 year ago
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Hello! I hope your having a nice day. I wanted to ask for Sai Nanami with a crush on reader in the stone world? If that's cool with you.
Thank you in advance!
Dr.Stone Sai Nanami with a crush on reader in the Stone World
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A/N: I stared at a photo of Sai for a very long time to get an idea of how to write this lmao, it’s kinda long because I wanted to include everything I could. I am by no means someone who understands code or programming, so writing this got my google searches looking like a child who first heard of the word “code” (While writing this I realised I got carried away…) 
Genre: Fluff
GN! Reader
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You’re one of the statues that Tsukasa revived, and became a part of the kingdom of science after the whole battle.
Back in the old world, your profession had something to do with technology, so you were very familiar with the world of programming. 
You joined Senku’s team in globe throttling, and off to maths city, India, you go!
When Ryusui mentioned a guy named Sai, you were intrigued
I mean, a genius mathematician who Ryusui claims to be a million times better than the average person? You naturally wanted to meet such a guy.
When you reached the place and dug out a statue of a guy whose hands were outstretched in many directions.
“That’s the million times smarter genius Sai?!” “He looks… Half-Indian,Half-Japanese?” “Great, another baaad pretty boy. Gotta say, I’m not a fan” your companions say, looking at the statue. “I wonder what he’s like?” Suika asked, to which Gen responded with, “A math genius could go one of a few ways…” painting the image of an over the top strict professor image and a socially awkward kid curled up and hugging their knees. 
“I wonder which one…” you mutter. They poured the revival fluid on him after dressing him up. And out from the stone comes a man with dark curls and with petrification marks covering his hands. “What’s… going on?!” The man named Sai questions, getting used to his surroundings. “Could it really be?! Did you people save me?! I can’t thank you enough…” he exclaims, a confused but thankful look on his face. 
He looked to his side and saw Ryusui with a stupidly happy look on his face. “PEEGYAAAAH!” Sai screams, running away, shocking everyone. “HA HA! Running at the sight of me? Show some tact! Catch him!” Ryusui laughingly orders, making Kohaku catch up to Sai and tackle him to the ground. 
“What in the world is happening?” You asked Senku, “heh, no idea.” he answered. “No, No, NO! I fled all the way to India, and it wasn’t far enough! I refuse to return to Nanami corp.!, Well, that’s as long as you’re involved!” Sai exclaimed, “Ah, I kinda have an idea…” you say, making Senku look at you and then towards Ryusui. “His full name is… SAI NANAMI!” Ryusui announced. “On your feet! We’re teaming up with that million times brainpower of yours!” Ryusui points. “Ryusui…is…my little brother!” Sai explained, pointing towards the blonde, shocking everyone.
After a whole explanation, Sai insists that he isn’t a genius that Ryusui points him out to be. “Um, that’s weird! So you’re not some freaky genius?!” Chelsea asked, scaring Sai. “Exactly! It’s a lie!” He answered. “How hilarious! Still glad to have you as a regular ol’ pal!” She replied, “Th-That’s good enough for you?” Sai asked, in awe. “Of course! Anyone is welcome!” You answered, making Sai look at you and it was at that moment, he thought it was love at first sight. “O-oh uhh t-thanks…” he mumbled bashfully. “HA HA! Don’t bet on it!” Ryusui appeared, ruining the mood and explained everything. 
“Mental Math is pointless!!” Sai exclaimed. “A computer could do the same calculation in an instant! And given enough time, anyone in the world could perform ten digit multiplication like me.” he added, making everyone question themselves. “T-ten digit…?!” you asked, shocked, making Sai blush. 
“I’m a programmer!!” he announced, catching your attention. “They all wanted to put me to work. So I left Nanami corp, and Ryusui… And fled all the way to a university in India!” Sai explained. “All I want…Is to code!” He states, looking happily at the sky, hands stretched as if typing on a keyboard. The look of sadness painted his eyes as he realised that he lost the one thing he loved the most. “I understand the feeling…” you mutter, suddenly missing your own gadgets. Sai asked how long will it take for a proper computer, to which Senku answered five to ten years, making you sad as well. “Why did you even revive a guy like me…” Sai sulked. You wanted to comfort him, but decided to give him some time alone for now to take in everything. 
Your group talked about how to go with the whole calculating the trajectory, and a few suggestions were given here and there, but nothing was set. Francios appeared, and was concerned because apparently Sai hasn’t touched his lunch yet even though it's dinner time. You all went to his room, peeking inside, you were shocked to see his walls filled with writings, to which you recognize as machine code. Your eyes lit up in awe.
Sai then sensed your presence, causing him to panic. “You see, I was thinking… Even if this world lacks computers, what I can do in the meantime is jot down some code for later.” Sai explained. “No one can really read any of this stuff. So this is “programming”?” Senku asked. 
“This is code for Dragon Quest!” you exclaimed, unable to keep your excitement at bay, shocking both Sai and Senku. “H-how’d you know..?” Sai asked shyly. “I’m also a programmer! Well, kind of… I worked in the field of technology back in the old world, so I’m very familiar with this stuff.” You explained, giving him a smile, causing blood to rush to his cheeks. 
It has been decided then and there that with Sai and your expertise, the stone world can make an old version of a computer. And in Sai’s eyes, that meant teaming up with you and spending more time with you. 
You and Sai asked how the computer was going to be made, to which Senku did a whole demonstration with flags. “Ooh, it's a simple Half-Adder!” you exclaimed, “easy enough to create with just a Xor gate and an And gate” Sai continued, confusing both Kohaku and Gen. Sai pointed out that the set up was pointless unless it was happening fast and electronically, which you agreed. To which Senku explained the more in-depth way. 
“How’re you feeling? Pretty overwhelming, isn’t it.” You asked Sai, who was staring in awe at the workers. “Uh… yeah… very much, is it always like this?” He asked, “Oh trust me, it was worse before.” you answered, along with a chuckle remembering when Ukyo, Taiju, Yuzuriha and Nikki first showed you the phone. 
“I haven’t properly introduced myself, haven’t I? I’m Y/N L/N. I used to work for tech companies in the past.” You introduced, offering an outstretched hand to the male. “Oh… Sai Nanami, programmer and a maths teacher at that university that Ryusui mentioned.” he answered, shaking your hand with a blushing face. “Looks like we’ll both be working with each other closely, I look forward to it!” You smiled, making his heart race. ‘Sai this is not the right time to fall in love! But… they’re so cute and kind and…’ Sai’s inner thoughts were interrupted when you called for him. The Adder circuit was finished, and Sai tinkered with it. You can definitely see the hope in his eyes return, the idea of a computer in this stone world wasn’t just a distant dream anymore.  
The more time you spent with Sai, the more you saw his love for programming, he’d ramble on and on about it for hours on end, and you’d listen to his ramblings. 
That means that the more time you spent with Sai, the more he developed his crush on you
I mean, no one else could understand him (literally) only you and maybe even Senku knows what he’s talking about, but Senku is always busy with science. 
You helped Sai make the circuit diagram that you both presented to the group, 
When Dr.Xeno instructed the making of fax machines, you saw his face light up with the idea of the stone world slowly reaching the modern era, and another step closer to his computer dream.
When Ryusui announced that the voyage must continue and to leave the work to corn city, Sai was conflicted. He didn’t want to join the voyage because Ryusui was there, but he also didn’t want to leave you now that his feelings are growing. “On that note, our brief time together ends. I’ll remain here in India to toil away on circuit diagrams which I'll fax to you once I can…” Sai says, “ehh? You won’t come with us?” you ask, Sai noticing the sadness in your voice, making his resolve weaken. “Get outta here. No, Literally, you’re coming with us, Sai! We’re shipping out together!” Ryusui exclaims. 
Chelsea was confused and so were you. “We’ll probably need his math skills at each location we visit!” Ryusui explains. “NUH UH! Not going! Certainly not with you, Ryusui!” Sai shouts. It was evident that he didn’t want anything to do with his brother, but it made you sad that you’ll be leaving him when you’ve been enjoying your time with him. “Not even sad about leaving Y/N?” Ryusui whispers to Sai, causing the older male’s face to be painted red and stuttering excuses, making the younger smirk. 
As night time fell, the fax machine started operating, and a photo of the people at corn city came out. “A group pic!” Chelsea exclaimed. “To mark the occasion? It looks like everyone joined the fun from both team Japan and team U.S.A” Gen says. You look towards Sai, when you notice the solemn look on the two brothers. 
You walked towards his room, determined to get to the bottom of it. You knock on his door, a small “come in” answers you.  “Hey, Sai… you good?” You ask, walking into his room. “Oh… uhh…” he started panicking when he realised it was you. “Uhh yeah…” he mutters. “You can tell me if something is bothering you, you know?” you offer. He looked at you with wide eyes and pink cheeks. ‘Damn it Sai! Get yourself together… why do they look good like this… wait, not the time!’ he slapped his cheeks to get the thoughts in order. 
“It just reminded me of the Nanami corp. Group photos.” Sai said, looking down. “Ryusui and I were the only ones not born to the matriarch of the Nanami family.” He explained, shocking you. “That explains why you and Ryusui look different from each other, and explains why you look half indian…” you say, immediately realising and then apologising. “Oh my! I’m sorry I didn’t mean it that way, it's just…” You panic, shocking Sai but he chuckles. “Don’t worry, I understand the confusion.” he reassures you, as you let out a sigh of relief. 
He explains how he and Ryusui were growing up, and how his family and Ryusui only wanted his skills in math and all of that. “That story is so stirring…” you say, “how so? Ryu is nothing but selfish. He uses people…” Sai exclaims. “You know, Sai… from what I understand. Ryusui just wanted to spend time with his older brother, you.” You say, taking hold of one of his hands. “Isn’t he a man of desires? He desires everything, including a brother that he can relate to. You said you both were the only ones left out, yeah?” you ask, he nods. “It seems he just wanted to create a bond with the only brother he has that understands him in that sense. Y’all only got each other, you know.” You added, Sai looked like he was understanding your words. 
“Tell me, did he ever order you to do these things?” you finished, and looked at him, he looked up with a look of understanding. “Thank you…” He muttered. You decided to let him have some alone time to think, “I’ll get going now, give you some alone time. If you ever need someone to talk to, I’ll be here for you, Sai.” you say with a smile and left his room. As soon as the door closed, he stared at his hand and exploded. ‘Oh my god they held my hand, oh my god they held my hand, oh my godddddd my heart is going to explode, good thing I was able to keep up the face because i was about to just sit here and die in front of themmm’ he thought, hands to his face hiding his red grinning face. 
‘They’re hands felt good holding mine, not soft, but that just shows how much they’ve been through to get where they are now, oh god i am falling hard… but, what they said about Ryusui… maybe he’s not as bad as i thought he was… maybe i can finally tolerate him enough to be okay with joining the voyage… and spend more time with them…wait, no! That’s not the goal here!!’ he panicked again. 
“HA HA! Sai! We’ve got some time before we part ways! Whip my skills into shape, won't you?! Let’s play chess together!” Ryusui barged in, shocking the older male. “Like I keep saying…No! Thank!...” he stopped his words when he remembered what you said. “Sure. Let’s play” he answered.
They had a brotherly talk, which made Sai sure with his decision of joining the crew’s voyage, and also fixing his family issues with Ryusui. “Sooo, I saw Y/N leave your room” Ryusui teased, earning a beet red and stuttering mess of an older brother spouting excuses. 
You were happy to find out that Sai was joining your voyage, the thought of leaving him in India made you sad, so to have him with you guys made you more excited to set sail. 
During the voyage, you all were busy working on the components of the computer, luckily for Sai, his work ties closely with yours so you two still got to spend a lot of time together.
Ryusui would often sweep in and throw in a teasing remark towards Sai, causing him to blush or stutter. 
The day the calculator was acquired, you could see how happy Sai looked, even during the mathlympics when he was just coding. You were impressed that he was able to code and confirm the answer to the problem very easily. 
You were also there as moral support from when Sai was teaching Suika and Chrome math, making your head hurt from all the numbers. But Sai liked how you were invested too, it was like he was able to show off to you. 
And when the computer was delivered, you and Sai were both in tears.
“We’ve got a boat scheduled to arrive today from North America to Japan! And Sai…It’s a delivery you’ve been dying for!” Ryusui announced, The ship docked and everyone was excited. Senku explained the specifications of the computer, to which Sai says that it’s on par with the NES. All the parts have been moved and assembled in the computer room, and now you and Sai were in your element, making punch cards. 
“Oh how I missed this!” you exclaimed, feeding a program Sai made to the computer, revealing a tetris like game. You both started making more cards to feed into the program, both totally in your element. When everyone retired for the day, you and Sai stayed in the computer room, still enjoying the computer and each other’s company in silence. 
And who knows, maybe the next program Sai makes is a game where he’ll let only you play, and confess his growing feelings for you that way. Because it was love at first sight, but it was also love that grew as you both got to share the one thing you both love.
But as far as he’s concerned, only you can surpass his love for programming and coding.
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petrichormore · 2 years ago
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did Bad’s stream crash or did q!BadBoyHalo just fucking die. top ten questions science still can’t answer
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courfeyracs-swordcane · 1 year ago
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For Kyrie, 💙🎂🤔👨‍👩‍👧‍👦?
💙 BLUE HEART — does your oc have any cool/special powers and/or abilities? how are they with magic, if it exists in their world?
GOOD QUESTION!! Unfortunately I have NOT figured out the worldbuilding enough to really answer that:
Things I know:
- There’s necromancy. (So there’s magic or at least alchemy)
- Kyrie (and also Punk) got tech weapons that run at least partially on some kind of magic (but they’re very much like computers? I can’t figure how to phrase it)
- Irt the last bullet point, I think most of the science runs on magic. The difference between the necromancy and the tech is essentially the difference between like. Orgo and regular chem.
- (Ari, the local mad scientist, is not aware of this. They see magic and science as entirely separate and they’re firmly on the science end. The magic likes them tho it follows them around in their fucked up basement lab and keeps them from dying from the shitty ventilation. Can’t bring their mom back but it Likes Them!)
- There’s saints! (there were. At one point. They died.)(I don’t think they do anything anymore but they did big/specific enough things with magic when they were alive that ppl still talk to them)
- That being said I think a lot of the monuments are monuments bc they got a lot of residual saint in them
- Kyrie lives in a monument. (squatting at the top of a big fuckoff tower dedicated to the guy who built the city)
- Also she’s hella superstitious. Girl who both believes in ghosts and is scared of them. Girl who’s kind of in awe of Ari’s whole schtick with the science and the necromancy. Mostly lives in the saint’s tower on account of for legal reasons it’s hard to get her out of there but I think also that’s her special guy she lives in his house.
🎂 BIRTHDAY CAKE — when is your oc's birthday? how old are they? what are their sun, moon, & rising signs (if known)? what about their tarot card, ruling planet, & ruling number (if known)? do they fit the typical traits of these sun, moon, & rising signs?
Okay I also got this question for Alonzo and every time I get closer to just slapping the frev agricultural calendar on there?? TLDR. Not that. Probably. But different months than ours that I still gotta figure out. She’s 29 tho!
🤔 THINKING FACE — what are some of your oc's quirks/mannerisms?
Okay I think I’m just half asleep and reading this funny but I’m honestly not sure what it’s asking? She generally comes off. Well at first she comes off really really intense about a lot of things and the wanted posters don’t help. But once you actually meet her she comes off as really passionate and gregarious! Laughs really easy and smiles so big it crinkles her whole face and both of those are always really genuine?
👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 FAMILY WITH MOTHER, FATHER, SON AND DAUGHTER — how many people are in your oc's immediate family? how many people are in your oc's extended family? do they have aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, etc? who in their family are they closest with? are they close with their birth family, or do they have a found family?
Still figuring out what exactly the deal is there how do these bitches just not have parents BUT! It’s pretty much just her and Alonzo as far back as it goes!
She’s significantly less found-familiable than he is though— top ten guys who are actively pushing ppl away when they try to found family her bc look what happened last time (accidentally is the reason her baby brother is in a hostage situation at her old job). Like she’ll be friendly with his friends (well. His part-time boyfriend and his boss, technically), and let them crash with her when they need to, and she would die for any of them, but they don’t get to do things for her she’s gonna do it all herself so she’s not dragging anyone else with her when she inevitably goes down (not sustainable. Babygirl get some help)
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seveneyesoup · 4 years ago
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microdosing on being an avatar of the hunt by falling in step behind someone and being as quiet as possible so they don’t notice you’re there
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helpimhyperfixating · 4 years ago
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Captive Together - Mer!Jotaro x Mer!Reader P1
Okay, fair warning, this oneshot is LONG. Like, really really long. I divided it into 4 parts but still every chapter is a monster. I edited it best I could, but when it takes a whole day to do so, you can get tired and unattentive, lol. This whole thing got out of hand and it is weird, but I like it. With that out of the way, enjoy some Mer!Joot 😌
Part 1  |  Part 2  |  Part 3  |  Part 4
Word Count: 8531
Opening your eyes, you winced a little at the stinging jab of pain that shot through your abdomen. With sluggish movements, you drifted forward until you could feel your hand hit glass. 
Right. You were in that human facility...
How did you end up in this mess again?
- - - -
“Quick! Go! Go!!” Your voice was urgent and a little panicked, scaring the two pups in front of you to do as you asked. They didn’t know who you were, where you came from, and if you were even able to be truly trusted, but the looming shadow closing in on your location and the terrifying rumble and roar of - what they thought was - a shark was enough to spur them into doing whatever you said.
You had just been swimming by, travelling from place to place looking for a place to live, maybe even a pod who’d accept you. And that was when you spotted the two pups, all by themselves and playing with the sand on the ocean floor, no adults in sight.
Seeing how big and mischievous their grins were, you quickly realised they had most likely snuck away from their pod; bringing back some memories from when you had done that yourself. 
With a good-natured sigh, you started to swim over, deciding to take them back to their pod before something would happen.
“Hey, you two.” You clicked out as you approached them calmly, a warm smile on your face. Upon the sound of a voice, the two - they couldn’t have been older than 1,5 years - shot their heads up, eyes comically widening. “What’re you playing?” You asked as you bridged the remaining gap, letting yourself float down to sit on the seabed close to them about two meters away; giving them a little bit of space yet also sitting close enough, to show them you meant no harm.
“We’ve never seen this kind of sand before.” The pup with a pretty, dark blue tail and impressive hairdo spoke up a little meekly and your smile widened just a little bit more at the sweet answer, making both kids relax a bit.
“So you decided to come out here and play in it?”
“Mhm!” The other pup, with a darker grey tail and two markings running crossed down his face, hummed happily, his voice sounding gruff as if he had spent a week in the Red Sea, even at his young age.
“Soo, you didn’t sneakily sneak away from your pod and parents to go exploring the big blue and happened to stumble across this seabed with sand you hadn’t seen before, right?” You questioned cheekily, leaning your chin in your hand as you raised a teasing eyebrow.
Both their eyes widened a bit and you chuckled while the pup with the hairdo curled in a bit on himself. “Are we in trouble?” 
“Not with me, no.” You smiled, making him come out of his shell a bit again. “With your parents however? I can’t say.” Now they were both making themselves small, guilty looks on their faces. “C’mon, I’m sure it will be fine.” You reassured them as you pushed yourself off the seabed, swimming over to the two pups until you were in right by them and placing a hand on either of their backs. “It’s best to get you back to your pod now though.”
“O-Okay.”
You hummed a little and pushed them gently to start swimming, one on either side of you. You looked between them both, seeing the anxious looks on their faces and decided to try and distract them a bit as you chaperoned them back. You happened to have noticed a pod took up residence in this area and these two smelled like they came from it, so you knew where to go. You also knew that pod was quite a ways away so you had to find a way to fill the time anyways.
“So, what are your names?”
“I-I’m Josuke, that’s Okuyasu.”
You hummed a little, giving them both another smile. “So, how long ago did you sneak out?”
“Uh, the sun was about there.” Josuke pointed up to where the sun had stood in the sky when they left, filtering through the surface of the water at an angle that told you they snuck out about an hour ago.
“Hm, well, maybe no one in your pod has noticed your absence yet and I can help you two sneak back in!” You started in a secretive voice, making both pups perk up. Okuyasu drifted a little closer to you and grabbed your hand, Josuke seeing and doing the same on your other side, nodding happily at you.
To be honest, you highly doubted no one had noticed their absence, but swimming with two anxious pups was something you would rather avoid. Not only because you feared your lack of experience would make you unable to handle it, but also because anxious pups meant slow pups, and matching their pace when they were anxiously swimming in dread for what was to come was about the most nail biting experience one could have.
“So, why did you swim out so far th-“ whatever you were going to ask was interrupted when your ears picked up on the distant sounds of a motorboat. 
Your eyes widening in alarm, the two pups noticed the warning signals you automatically gave off and soon picked up on the noise as well, seeing as the boat was speeding closer very fast. 
Now, humans were aware of the existence of Mer, but this was supposed to be a protected area. So if there were humans here, especially those with the loud motors? That could only mean bad news.
“Quick! Go! Go!!” You wrenched your hands from their grips before starting to push on their backs, trying to urge them to go.
Okuyasu let a feared whine escape from his throat while Josuke immediately employed the tactic he had been taught to use whenever in danger: call out.
“Shark! Shark!” He trilled out in a panic, the trills and clicks of his voice carrying a lot further through the water than at his normal pitch and volume, soon joined by Okuyasu in the same fashion as he remembered what he was supposed to do.
While you were glad they had their security systems in order, you knew how clever humans were, especially those who went against the rules set in place, and you feared that they might hear the two pups.
“Ssh, ssh, I’ll keep you safe from the shark! Let’s hide between those rocks, come on!!” You managed to grab both their little hands again and frantically dragged them along with you as you swam full speed towards the rocks that sat about forty meters away, both Josuke and Okuyasu too shocked by the sudden speed they were being pulled along with to keep shouting warnings in panic.
It was dangerous to get to the rocks. The boat was almost right above you by now and to get to safety, you had to swim with the pups underneath the belly of the thing. The water was crystal clear today and the chances of being seen were high.
Safety for the pups was your one and only priority though and so you gunned it.
With an incredible speed, you shot through the water, making full use of your tail as you dragged the poor kids with you, them trying their best to flap their tails and help swim - although it was mainly for decoration and show by now.
Forty meters,
Thirty five,
Thirty,
You were now swimming directly underneath the boat and you tilted your head, keeping a wary eye on the thing as you saw it suddenly stop and rock, presumably from movement from the humans on top.
Twenty five,
A shape on the boat, barely able to be made out through the distortion of the water, tipped you off to the incoming danger and you immediately pulled Josuke and Okuyasu in, pushing them forward with all your might right before a sharp and searing pain shot past your left side.
From the boat, someone had thrown a harpoon down, the speed and angle serving to graze your side, creating a nasty cut on your waist that ran from there, diagonally over part of your stomach before the thing embedded itself in the sea floor.
A sharp and searing pain came in waves but you refrained from calling out, only hissing through your teeth with a small grunt before you shook your head, ignoring it for now as you saw a rope was attached to the end of the sharp stick. It was slowly wrenched free from the sand and you wasted no time in shooting past it, scooping Okuyasu and Josuke up in your arms as you rushed past them, seeing as they were clinging onto each other in shock as they saw you being hit.
“You’re bleeding!” 
“It’s okay!” You chirped back over the rush of water coming past as you tried to swim as fast as possible with the pain, leaving a trail of blood behind as you went.
Fifteen,
Ten,
Five,
“Okay, hide behind those rocks and stay there no matter what happens okay? Don’t come out until someone from your pod comes and gets you, do you understand?!” You shook them both a little, maybe not being the best course of action but you had to make your point clear.
“O-Okay!”
“Don’t make a sound either!” You called back over your shoulder as you started swimming away, secretly looking to see if they were well hidden and stayed put as you asked them to. You saw the both of them look at you with fear and anxiousness, peeking from behind the rocks, and sent them the last best reassuring smile you could muster before turning to look forward again and booking it. You were gonna save those pups if it cost you your damn life.
- - - -
Your fuzzy memory finally began to clear up a bit and you remembered how another boat came and chased the hunter’s one away. You had led the hunter’s boat away from the pups but got trapped in a cove, only for the new boat with science humans to come to your aid.
Upon seeing your injury, they got very concerned and offered to take you with them so they could treat you and help you.
Despite their honeyed words and friendly appearance though, there was one blaring warning signal. These humans that were claiming to trying to ‘help you’, smelled exactly like the ones from the boat that had injured you. Which meant these people had interacted; and not just in passing or a small falling out, no they spent a while with each other to have the scent rub off that heavily. 
In other words, these were no friends to you.
Despite knowing this, you had agreed to their offer. Those pups were still nearby, what could you have done? Maybe if they took you along they’d be satisfied, and never realise there were more Mer nearby. And so you allowed them to take you.
-
“Good news! Today the bandages come off and we are planning to transport you to a bigger tank while you further recover!” One of the humans you had come to see a little more often in your past two days in this tiny tank approached, that easily recognisable false smile on his face. Whenever he approached like that, there was something else behind it. Yet, you pretended to not notice, perking up in happiness and sloshing around in your tank like an excited puppy despite the pain that brought.
“For me?” You asked. Your human English was a little rusty and sounded somewhat garbled, which was no surprise given how you had to use completely different parts of your vocal cords to speak it, but at least it was understandable.
“Yes!” He grinned before stepping even closer. “And! Inside there is a surprise! Around the same time as we found you, we found another Mer, stuck in a fishing net. They’re in the tank you will be transferred to today!” He sounded genuinely happy this time and you realised with a bit of horror he probably saw it all as a big experiment. Most likely wanting to see how two of the same species reacted upon meeting. “It’s that one over there!” He pointed behind himself to a large tank on the opposite end of the large room.
You had noticed this tank almost immediately when you first got to this facility. After all, why were you stuffed into a tiny tank that was more fitted to fit an octopus rather than the large tank that was available right there? But if it housed another Mer then that was logical. Probably a bigger Mer than you as well.
You had seen the scientists hover around it but you never saw any creature inside when you looked at it.
Would it be a male or female waiting for you in there? Given the man’s excitement however, you had a hunch. All you could say was you hoped they hadn’t been injured by the humans to bring in like you were.
- - - -
You spent the rest of the day just trying everything in your power to annoy the ever living fuck out of the scientists around.
You were in a small glass tank, barely big enough to let you stretch your tail out fully and with an open top, allowing you to communicate.
Sloshing around and making water spill over the tank was one of your favourite things to do, your goal to make the papers in the hands of the scientists wet or to make them slip and slam a few teeth out on the floor. If they glare at you, you just acted like it was completely involuntary, having pain in your injury, or the need to move being the cause of you sloshing and splashing so much.
Your next method of annoying scientists was: throwing the small ball they had given you directly to their heads. It was a small yellow thing, apparently filled with air so that it would float on the water. And just the perfect size to lob at someone’s head.
Of course, if they turned around angry, ball in hand, you’d act as if it was all a game. All a game your dumb and simple mind could come up with. And so the scientists just let it happen, picking up the ball and begrudgingly returning it to you every time so you wouldn’t start sadly whining like some puppy.
And that was exactly what your goal was; to convince them you were no smarter than a seal.
Of course, you had the ability of speech, but you intentionally kept your vocabulary in the low. Talking a bit like a pup, with missing or incorrectly pronounced words while the rest of your behaviour mirrored it.
You smiled a lot, indulging the scientists in questions about Mer life that you answered ‘as best you could’ while in reality you were stringing lie after lie after lie. You pretended to be their friend, just like they did to you. What comes around, gets around, after all.
Sometimes though, when you were talking to the humans, you felt as if there were eyes on you. And not the scientist eyes or the camera eyes, but angrier ones.
-
As the morning bled into noon, you noticed how warily the scientists were being around the big tank. It was open at the top same as yours and reached until about the human’s midriff, but the rest of the tank disappeared into the floor for it was probably a lot deeper than it seemed to you if there was another Mer in there that you’d never even seen before.
But, noticing how hesitant the humans were to stick their head over the glass and look down, you figured you’d test them a little. 
No one was really paying attention to- or around you, so you picked up your little yellow ball - the only entertainment you had - and tested its weight a few times before chucking it so hard and so far that it soared over everyone’s heads and plopped right in the bigger tank.
As it landed, you cheered as if it had been your childish goal all along before expectantly looking at the humans. They were, after all, expected to bring it back to you.
Much to your internal delight, you watched how the humans looked back at you in horror and disbelief. It all but confirmed your suspicions that whoever was in there, was very much not happy. And different from you, they decided to go the aggressive route.
When none of the scientists made a move to retrieve your ball for you, you started to make a little whining noise in the back of your throat, making puppy eyes and starting to look all sad.
If the Mer in there indeed went the aggressive route, that meant that your plan was still in full swing. For, if they only exuded aggression, the scientists wouldn’t necessarily see many signs of higher intelligence. They would most likely chock it up to animal instinct instead of genuine anger. Which meant you could continue playing as dumb as you liked without them getting suspicious.
“It’s okay! I’ll, uh... go get it for you!” One of the scientists spoke up towards you and you perked up a little, gripping the edge of your tank and pushing up a bit to mock excitement.
Curiously, you watched as he went to grab a long net on a stick. Was it not within arms reach? 
You watched as he walked back over to the tank and warily started inching the pole towards the ball. The entire thing shook with nervousness and you watched in awe as suddenly, out of nowhere, a large Mer shot up, slashing through the invading item and breaking it clean in half before disappearing below the floor again in a flash.
The scientist screamed in fear as the pole got cut clean through, the net falling down into the water before sinking, while one of the other humans went to comfort the scared one.
That was the best thing you had seen in all your time being here.
“What has been said about unauthorised interactment with the large tank?!” A large booming voice suddenly sounded from the door the humans constantly walked in and out of and you, together with all the scientists, turned your heads towards it.
“S-She threw her ball in there, I was just trying to get it back like protocol says!”
“She can go get it herself. We’re transferring her right now.”
All eyes turned to you with that and you shrunk a little, lowering yourself into the water until only your eyes shyly peeked out. Somehow you had a bad feeling about this.
- - - - 
Bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad! BAD!
You were dangling in mid air on a crane or contraption, some sort of harness put around you and painfully rubbing against your wound. Mers healed faster than humans but your wound was still very much present and open and painful. Did they completely forget you had that or something?? They were even supposed to take off the bandaging today and they didn’t! Although right now it was your only protection from excruciating pain.
Your tail barely had any support and was basically dangling in mid-air, held up only by the fact and grace of being attached to you and your attempt of using your abdominal muscles to keep it steady. Unfortunately for you, that was where your wound was as well, so WAHEY!
You were cursing up a storm as the crane moved you across the room, hovering over the floor as if you were flying. To the scientists, it just sounded like a bunch of panicked clicks and trills, but for you, you were using language so colourful, it would make anyone blush.
Water dripped from you like stalactites in a wet cave and the only satisfaction you had in this moment was that it would make the floor a little slippery for the scientists, hopefully with at least one falling on their face. After what seemed like an excruciatingly long time but was only a few minutes, you were dangling over the larger tank. 
Your knuckles were white as you gripped onto the harness holding you up. You looked down and noticed how big it actually was. As you tried to gauge the depth from above the water however, the support holding you up clicked loose and you fell down into the tank, harness and all.
Thankfully, you managed to angle yourself to dive in at least a little gracefully instead of just belly flop in - which would be very bad from that height and with your injury.
As you fell into the water you had your arms protectively shielded over your head and your eyes screwed shut, but now you hesitantly blinked them open, bringing your arms down as you sunk down a tiny bit more before stopping.
Looking to your right, you were surprised to see several scientists looking through the glass. Apparently there was a room a floor lower which gave them perfect view of the big tank and the happenings inside it. They all had clipboards and notes and whatever, ready to record and write down everything that was about to happen.
That was the last thought you could really give it, for you suddenly saw something large and fast move from the bottom of the tank, all the way up to you.
Curling in on yourself on instinct, you looked up only to be met by one of the biggest and most intimidating Mer you had ever seen. His torso was in proportion to you but his tail was absolutely massive, almost twice the size of yours. It was strong and powerful looking, sleek black and probably about four or four and a half meters in length while his torso himself was impressive as well, muscle and raw power screaming from every inch of him.
How in the fuck were those scientists ever able to capture him?
His face was set in a glare and you instantly averted your eyes, displaying submissiveness as you turned your head and bowed it a little.
Now, you had wanted to display submissive behaviour from the beginning, just to keep your act up, no matter what kind of Mer was in here, but when you opened your mouth to try and talk and he growled in warning, you immediately slammed it shut. This shark Mer made it very easy. 
After a few more seconds of him glowering at you, you opted for safety and abruptly turned around, swimming down as fast as you could to the bottom of this 20-meter deep tank and shooting into the massive skull that sat there. You had to struggle to fit through the eye, the harness still on you hooking against it and hindering you even more, but with some squeezing and manoeuvring, you managed to get inside.
Looking out of one of the eyes, you saw he hadn’t really moved but was still glaring at you before letting out a ‘Tch’ and casually turning to the side, languidly swimming away and down to the corner opposite of the one you were in. 
There was a thick, white, concrete column in the middle of the tank, impeding your vision of him as he disappeared behind it.
Letting out the breath you were holding, you closed your eyes for a second before inhaling the water around you. It felt much cleaner and more crisp than the stuffy tank you had been forced to sit in, though the scent of the other Mer was very present as well. 
Looking down at yourself, you hissed a little and cursed out the humans as you grabbed hold of the harness and lifted it as far away from the wound on your side and stomach as possible. 
The skull you were in provided cover yes, but it was also half buried in sand and you barely had any room to move or even breathe, let alone try to get that damn harness off. Going out while the shark Mer was around and wary of you seemed like a bad idea however so you just stayed put, opting to wait until night before getting out and trying to get the damn thing off.
So, in the time you were waiting, you decided to try and figure out what the fuck kind of skull you were in. It was slanted and half buried in sand, elongated jaw with big round eye sockets. It sure as hell wasn’t any animal you knew of. You even started doubting if it was a real animal at all. When you touched it it definitely didn’t feel like bone at least.
Several hours passed like that and you finally peeked your head out the eyehole again. 
The tank itself was not too bad. The bottom was filled with sand and rocks, water plants and seaweed and such sticking out and growing from it, making it look rather natural. 
With some effort, you squeezed yourself out of the eyehole again, hissing as you scraped your wound before settling on the sand right in front of the skull and starting to wriggle and tug at the harness.
Why did the humans do it like this? Weren’t they supposed to take it off? Or were they so afraid of your new tank-mate that they just decided ‘fuck it, you’re on your own’?
Aggravated, you attempted to pull it over your head. Unsuccessful. 
You tried to unclasp it. The clasps are at the back where you can’t reach. Unsuccessful.
You attempted to pull it apart. You are not strong enough. Unsuccessful. 
By now you were running out of options and just violently tugging at the constricting thing. It sat over your gills on your neck, making it hard to breathe - though that didn’t stop you from spitting every curse in the book at the scientists who were undoubtedly still watching, even if the glass where they stood earlier was as dark as the night. 
A flutter of the water suddenly reached your ears and you snapped your head up to see the shark Mer quickly swimming towards you, angry and with a murderous look in his eye. 
Under optimal circumstances you would have hidden somewhere he couldn’t fit, like the skull. Unfortunately for you, you were wearing a harness and also wouldn’t be able to get inside fast enough. 
With not many options left, you darted to the left, quickly swimming away. Taking a glance back, you gasped when you saw he was in hot pursuit. With his larger tail he was quickly gaining but you shot to the side, cutting the corner around the concrete pillar in the middle as much as possible.
Looking to the left briefly, you spotted a corner where the sand was more tailored than everywhere else, a large indent where a body had been resting. 
That was all the time you got to look at it however, since you were already rounding the pillar again to show the skull you had been hiding in. 
Right now, you cursed yourself for darting. There was no way you could outswim him. You should have just rushed into the skull back there or stayed still, hoping he wouldn’t tear you apart. Now, all you could do was try to get back in the skull.
That was a vain hope however, as he had already caught up with you. 
Your blood froze as his right arm curled around your waist, ready to grab. Yet before he did, he hesitated. Instead, he allowed you to slip away a bit further before clamping his arm around your tail, tightly grabbing hold there as he forcefully stopped your momentum and yanked you back, grabbing your shoulders with both hands once in range.
In one smooth motion, he slammed you shoulders first into the concrete pillar before removing one hand and using the claws on it to rip straight through the harness still stuck on you. 
“Stop disturbing the water with your thrashing and sleep!” He growled out, a threatening undertone in his voice while his face was so close to yours.
You were breathing fast and staring back with wide eyes but it seemed he wanted an answer before he backed off so you nodded. 
Seemingly content with that, he rudely shoved you aside before lazily swimming away, flicking his hand to get rid of some excess fabric of the harness, his tail swishing side to side as he disappeared behind the pillar again to the corner he seemed to have taken up residence in, not looking back once.
You blinked a few times, looking at where he disappeared for some seconds before you swam up, swimming out of the harness with as little tail motion as possible.
Your breathing finally levelled and you turned back around, grabbing the remains of the harness and swimming over to the skull, draping the destroyed thing over a lip on the outside before squeezing into the eye. 
- - - -
Waking from your slumber, you got to work digging. 
You had a hunch this skull was going to be your home for the time being, so you decided to make a better way of entering and exiting. Digging through the sand laying in the mouth of the skull, you followed the elongated jaw and dug until you made a nice little opening that you wouldn’t have to squeeze through.
While you were digging, you noticed the other Mer swimming around. He avoided your little hovel but otherwise would not sit still. Making laps, checking the corners, running his hand along the wall of the tank as if testing it. 
Everything pointed to him wanting to get out of here, just as much as you did.
For now, you decided to keep staying out of his way though.
Right as you exited your skull, you were met with the powerful and intimidating form of the merman. There goes your plan. “What’re you doing?” He snapped at you almost, his tone curt and to the point.
You were still half inside but decided to just stay there like that, looking up at him. “I’m making an easier and less painful entrance.” You explained, motioning to the blood stained bandage on your side. It was designed to be worn under water but even so you doubted it was doing much good.
“Well, be more quiet, you’re making too much noise.” He growled before turning around, nearly hitting you with his tail fin as he went.
You were about one second away from giving him a well earned tap on said tail fin, but managed to refrain yourself at the last second.
“Wait.” You called out after him and he surprisingly enough stopped, looking back at you over his shoulder while you got out of the skull fully. “What’s your name?”
“...” 
He didn’t say anything for a second, just looking intently at you for a second, almost as if he was searching for something. Whatever he found he must have been satisfied with though.
“Jotaro.” 
A smile appeared on your face at his answer and that piqued his interest. For, when he had been watching you in the small tank opposite the room, you had smiled so much whenever the scientists interacted with you, and it had annoyed him to the point of making his blood boil. But now? Up close? He could see this was the first genuine smile you had given since arriving in this facility, even if it was timid.
“Nice to meet you, I’m Y/N. Let’s get the fuck outta here soon, okay?”
Before anything else could be said, you heard your name being called from above. You had given it to the humans but that didn’t stop the pit of disgust when you heard it. Your face contorted for just a second before you steeled yourself and twisted it into the sweet innocent look the humans were used to.
Unknown to you, Jotaro warily watched you as you did that, sharp eyes following your form as you went to the skull and grabbed the harness laying on top before swimming up to the surface.
Shyly poking your head out of the water, you darted your eyes back and forth a bit before landing on the man standing right next to the edge of the tank who had called you.
“Good morning.” He smiled and you bobbed your head a bit in greeting. “Where is the harness?” He then asked and you let your hand drift to the surface, the broken harness in hand.
The man tutted a little but then stuck out his hand, taking it from you before moving it to his other hand and using the one in the water to motion you closer, pointing at the bandaging around your waist. “We didn’t have time to take a look at that yesterday. How about now, Hm?”
God how you wanted to bite his hand. Leave that damned harness on all night and then act like nothing happened? Claiming to just want to look at and take care of your wound again? It almost made you regret trying to trick them by acting dumb and nice.
Someone else didn’t have the gripe of trying to keep up the act of being friendly however.
Out of nowhere, Jotaro breached right in front of you, immediately diving back down and pushing you down with him while he violently smashed his tail against the scientists outstretched hand.
Said scientist screamed in pain as several of the bones snapped at the powerful strike, others rushing towards him while Jotaro just left the chaos behind and pushed you further down before abruptly letting go about halfway to the bottom.
“The fuck are you doing.” He snarled and you backed up a bit.
“What do you mean?”
“Interacting with them. What is your plan to get out of here that makes you need to get all friendly with them?” 
As he said that, you tried to steady your breathing. No matter his looks or his seeming temper, his mind was clearly not to be underestimated and already proved to be very sharp. He knew you were putting up an act.
“I’m trying to make them think I am no more intelligent than like, what? A four or three year old human?” You spoke, getting a little lost in thought thinking about human ages and their behaviours during it.
“Why.”
Jotaro’s voice snapped you out of it and you focused again.
“If they expect this level of intelligence from me-“ You kept your hand flat and stationary at the level of your bellybutton. “-they will tailor security measures and such around that level of intelligence. Humans like to cut corners. If they think I don’t know how to open a door, they won’t lock it.” You continued and Jotaro had his eyes narrowed at you. “So, when I suddenly show this level of intelligence-“ You moved your hand up and hovered it at the level of your neck. “-they won’t expect it and I’ll be able to get out of here while they try to figure out what happened.
Despite seemingly getting your explanation, Jotaro seemed truly revolted by the idea of buttering up the scientists.
Without another word, a frustrated rumble tumbled from his chest and he turned to the right, starting to swim away, back to his corner. But not before stopping once more and looking back at you. “Don’t let them touch you.” With that, he continued on his way.
Bringing your arm in, you held it to your chest as you watched him swim away.
- - - - 
About two days passed and during that, your communication with Jotaro had been minimal. You two more or less avoided each other - though there wasn’t any bad blood between you two.
Just now, a big slab of tuna had been lowered and - while you had planned to just wait until Jotaro was done - he seemed to have other plans. He sliced off a chunk, letting it drift down as if he didn’t notice it falling while he himself continued with what he had. Yet subtly, you could see him look at you, releasing one low click sound from deep within his chest. A non-verbal go-ahead that many leaders of a pod used; to show that it was for you.
Sending him a quick smile, you darted over and scooped up the meat from below him right before it could touch the floor. With that, you then turned around and went to the corner opposite of him. For once, Jotaro was not in his usual corner. And you were going to make full use of it by doing what you had been meaning to for the last few days.
Putting the tuna in your mouth and just holding it there, you started plucking the gigantic seaweed that grew from the bottom, slicing it at the soil with your claws until your arms were practically completely full.
Peeking your head around the pillar, you saw Jotaro still eating and thus silently yet quickly swam over to his corner.
The sand was bunched up in a small hill on one end, a deeper and bigger indent right in front of it, showing it was where Jotaro slept every night. There were some plants growing around it, but not many. None close enough that they would be able to bend in the current and annoy him as he tried to sleep at least. That was good.
Now, you knew sleeping on the sand was fine. You had been doing it yourself, even insulated and kept a little more warm because of your protective surrounding skull. And, while the heap of sand behind the dent was meant for the same purpose - to retain some body heat - you knew from experience that plants were way better at that.
So, you started placing the seaweed leaves on the sand indentation. One by one you placed them down, layering them over comfortably until it padded the entire space.
You were happy you picked a lot because you had underestimated how big Jotaro’s bedding would be, seeing he was quite massive as well.
Next came the tricky part. Getting the leaves to stick together and stay on the sand, paired with getting rid of all the prickly edges.
Opting to make sure it stayed in place first, you curled the edges of the leaves around the edge of the sand indent and buried it firmly in the grain, making sure to tuck it in well and good so that it would not let go. With that out of the way, you began chipping away at the sharp edges. 
You worked as fast as you could, wanting to be finished before Jotaro was done eating and would return here. 
Finally done with the snipping, you ran your hand across it, satisfied that there was no uncomfortable plant membrane sticking out anymore.
Onto the last step, you started with the hardest part: weaving the plants together. Cutting small incisions in the leaves with your nails, you started interlocking those cut sections, fitting them together like a puzzle until every leaf on the entire bed was interwoven.
You were almost done when you spotted movement out of the corner of your eye. Turning your head, you saw Jotaro swimming closer, a confused yet wary look on his face. 
In the blink of an eye you were already swimming away, booking it towards your skull and shooting inside with practiced ease. You were pretty sure Jotaro couldn’t fit through the mouth, so you felt relatively safe in case he got mad about you messing with his sleeping spot.
No angry sounds came however. 
- - - -
Several more days passed just like that. You had made a seaweed bed for yourself as well, stuffing it in the skull and spending quite some time digging a little further into the sand so that you would have a true little hovel. Because of this you realised the skull had no lower jaw, which allowed you to dig down into the sand, causing for even more insulation to keep yourself warm at night. Was it necessary? No. Did it feel great to sleep in a warm environment? You bet it did.
Your interaction with Jotaro was still bar to none. Although he did seem more accepting of you, no longer letting out a dangerous or angry rumble when you moved too much or splashed around a bit.
You had gone back to playing with your yellow ball, throwing it at the scientists heads - though they dodged it more easily now that their attention wasn’t divided between two tanks. Still, whenever you did hit one of them, it felt like a huge accomplishment. 
While pretending to play however, you took the opportunity to gather information. Pick up on what the scientists were saying, checking the tank walls while you were pretending to swim around as fast as you could - while in actuality you went only about half as fast. In particular, hopping up on top of the concrete column rewarded you with figuring out there were cameras in the thing. They were small, built in and probably very expensive.
So the scientists were watching your every move even if they weren’t watching.
You honestly felt terrible when you figured that out and had retreated back to your skull, not coming out for 28 hours, not even for food.
About thirteen days had passed since you first came here, and you still had no idea how to get out...
- - - -
To say the scientists of the research facility were in excited chaos and confusion that morning was an understatement. 
After nearly two weeks of no process at all with the Mer they captured - the two of them only avoiding each other as much as possible - they come in for work, only to see the two of them curled up in the male’s nest and sleeping together!?
“What the hell happened?! John! Get the footage of last night!”
“Right!” Said man immediately sprinted away to get it while the rest stayed glued to the glass, watching the two Mer as best as they could with how far away from the glass they had set up camp.
A few minutes later, John returned and they all watched with baited breath to see what happened. 
Operating the four cameras, they switched between them and fast forwarded the footage from last night until there was motion, pressing play.
“What happened that gave them a change of heart?” 
- - - -
Disturbance in the water had roused Jotaro from his sleep. 
There was absolutely nothing in this tank except for a feeble artificial water current that helped with filtering. So, to suddenly feel such jerking motions in the water could only mean that it was the other occupant of the tank.
Jotaro tried to ignore it for a bit and go back to sleep but the irregularity and violence in which you were moving meant there was no chance of that.
A little annoyed, Jotaro got up and started swimming over to the skull you had taken residence in. 
Unlike the last time you had woken him up during the night, you were not in front of it. Furrowing his brows, Jotaro turned up and swam to one of the eye sockets. Gripping the edge of it, he pulled himself closer and peered inside.
It was hard to make anything out in the dark but with the limited night vision he had, Jotaro could see your form, completely curled in on yourself on top of a bed similar to what you had made for him. 
Only, then you twitched.
Your whole body jolted for a bit, a barely audible squeak leaving you before you settled again, only for you to jolt again a few seconds later. Your face was screwed up in pain and discomfort and Jotaro let his gaze drift to your waist, seeing if you could be in pain from that, even if it should have healed for the majority of it.
It wasn’t that though. You didn’t clutch at it in pain or explicitly tried to avoid touching it. You seemed to just be having a nightmare.
For a moment Jotaro considered just leaving. You’d wake up from it eventually and would then just go back to sleep. But that thought was quickly chased away.
Not ever had he seen you so... vulnerable. And as he looked at you, something in him screamed at him to protect you. To protect you, to hold you, to keep you close and safe. Only after a few seconds of feeling his stomach twist did Jotaro realise. Wait, shit- did he just imprint on you?
Just like pups would imprint on parents, so could future mates imprint on each other. It didn’t always happen or all that often actually, but something in Jotaro told him that that was exactly what just happened. Fuck.
Stunned for a few seconds longer, it was another small whimper from you that snapped him out of it. Pushing forward, Jotaro got closer to the eye but he could soon see that he wouldn’t be able to reach you through there with his arm, you were too far to the back and he definitely wouldn’t be able to fit. Hell, he wouldn’t even be able to put both his shoulders through there, let alone his tail.
So, with no other option, Jotaro would have to fully go inside another way.
He didn’t want to invade your personal space, but what other choice did he have? With a bit of hesitation, he swam towards the entrance you had dug and looked down into it. While it was big enough for you to be a comfortable and easy fit, Jotaro would either not fit at all, or have to really squeeze.
He got up for a second and sighed. He could hardly believe he was actually gonna do this. With a little stretch of his back and tail in anticipation, he grabbed hold of the roof of the mouth of the skull. 
Lifting it out of the sand was less heavy than he had thought, most likely because of the light material of the skull, but that didn’t mean it was easy. The sand was suctioning it quite strongly but he only had to lift it a little bit to accommodate himself, not pull it out completely. 
After a few seconds of lifting it up, Jotaro released it, content to see it stayed at the same height he had put it in before he almost immediately ducked down and made his way inside.
Swimming slowly to not scare you awake even more than you probably would be, Jotaro reached where you were tucked in the corner.
“Y/N.” He softly called out your name but it didn’t do shit. With a lack of social skills or experience, and the need to do at least something, Jotaro instead just opted to grab your shoulder. “Wake up.”
In an instant, you came to life. Seeing nothing but a large form hovering over you caused an immediate fight or flight response and you grabbed at the hand on your shoulder, using your other to swipe at your attacker, only for them to grab both your wrists.
“It’s just me, calm down.” The voice of Jotaro spoke and your breath hitched in your throat. Jotaro? What? How?
Any logic was cast out of your mind as your instincts kicked in. Right as Jotaro let go of your wrists, you shot forward and clung to him. The safety that him being larger and stronger provided and the body heat he emitted the only thing playing in your barely awake mind, still half stuck in the nightmare.
Jotaro was taken aback as you wrapped around him, yet, for what felt like the first time in forever, he welcomed the contact. As he raised one arm to attempt to wrap it around you and provide more safety, he instead painfully slammed his elbow against the skull, making you squeak and cling tighter to him before realising it was not a threat and letting up a bit.
As much as Jotaro wanted to, he couldn’t stay here. This skull could barely fit him as is, let alone with another person there. 
Patting your shoulder twice, you looked up at him and Jotaro felt his heart seize at the look you gave him. You also understood what he meant however and let go of him, floating back a bit.
Placing his hand on your head, Jotaro turned with a bit of effort and swam out of the skull.
As his tail disappeared from sight, you cast your eyes down. You were so tired and barely conscious enough to keep your eyes open, yet still, going back to sleep sounded like the last thing you wanted to do.
Suddenly however, you felt your wrist being grabbed and Jotaro yanked you with him out of that skull.
Confusion riddled your sleep heavy mind and you barely had enough thought to move your tail, attempting to help swim but mostly being dragged along by Jotaro.
Before long, you two reached Jotaro’s nest and he sat down on it, pulling you a bit closer since you were practically as far away as you could be, stretched out arms and confused. When you still didn’t seem to get it, Jotaro pulled you down with him until you were pressed against him, your back to his chest as he had his arm around you from behind. His tail started curling around you until it fully encased your form, pushing under your head until you were laying it on top, as if using his tail as a pillow. 
“Sleep.” Jotaro spoke softly from right behind you, almost whispering it into your ear, making your heart skip a beat. Almost immediately after saying that, a faint and low rumble began coming from his chest, almost as if he were purring, and you could instantly feel yourself becoming less anxious.
The soft vibrations on your back together with the protective arm wrapped over you and the strong, thick tail curled around and in front of your entire body made you feel safer than you had in a long time - maybe ever. 
By now, you could barely remember your nightmare, only that it scared you to death. But even then, all those fears were slowly driven away by the comfort of Jotaro’s warmth and the protection he brought.
Part 1  |  Part 2  |  Part 3  |  Part 4
667 notes · View notes
heliads · 2 years ago
Note
(Toms Peter x male reader)
Can you write a story where Peter tries to get the readers attention doing various stuff but the reader is complexly oblivious to peters obvious tactics to try to get with him until Peter asks on a shy way if the reader doesn’t like him?. ❤️
this dynamic is so superior. also i realized i haven't written for tom's peter in so long i miss him
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Peter Parker is trying his absolute hardest to make this work, and after all of his efforts, he’s still come up with nothing at all. The most difficult task in Peter’s life should probably have to do with his secret reality as Spider-Man, all the times he’s risked death to protect a city that really doesn’t know him all that well, yet it isn’t. Peter doesn’t even think he was this stressed when he got his abilities in the first place and could suddenly start sticking to walls and taking hits that would normally kill anyone else.
And, instead of handling his problems like a normal person (because Peter’s totally normal at this point, yeah, right), Peter is instead flinging himself into his struggles with the force of a hurricane. It feels as if his every waking moment is spent trying to find the answer to a puzzle that refuses to stop stumping him.
This problem, one might ask? Is it an impossible science question that brainiacs and scholars have studied for centuries? A battle plan for how to take down the latest villain plaguing New York? Literally anything that would account for the amount of hours Peter has poured into this? No. It’s all to do with a crush.
A crush. Peter is driving himself mad over a crush that doesn’t even like him back. That’s the problem, of course, because Peter has gone and fallen for Y/N L/N, the one boy who means the most to Peter and thus will hurt him the most when he can’t seem to like Peter the way he wishes.
That’s what you get for falling for your friend, Peter supposes. If he could have just minded his own business, kept his head down and only felt things that were strictly platonic, Peter could have avoided this whole mess. Instead, he’s counting the amount of times his heart has skipped a beat upon seeing a familiar smile, and he’s completely, utterly smitten.
Peter’s one goal in life has now switched away from handling life as Spider-Man or getting the top grades in his classes to figure out how to get Y/N to like him back. Or, the bare minimum, finding a way for Y/N to actually pay attention to him. He’s not having great luck in either department.
In truth, Peter doesn’t know how he’s supposed to get Y/N to fall in love with him if Y/N seems far more invested in whatever he’s doing at the moment than Peter himself. Y/N literally works in Tony Stark’s labs and goes to Peter’s high school, yet Peter’s scrounging for scraps of a conversation like they’ve never had less in common.
It makes no sense, which is what’s killing him. Surely they should be the best of friends, right? Peter has imagined how things should have gone about a thousand times already. They should be trading inside jokes like playing cards, whispering over discoveries that no one else in the school could even hope to understand. Y/N knows that Peter is Spider-Man, for heaven’s sake, and that still isn’t enough to interest him.
It’s unfathomable. Peter isn’t going to claim that he’s always needed attention, far from it. Peter has always been content to fade more into the background, to watch as people make mistakes and learn from the whole of it. Yet when it comes to Y/N, Peter finds himself desperate to have just a fraction of the other boy’s heart. Even a little bit would be enough, but no.
They’re in the labs again today, and Peter’s distracted from his work by another bout of wishing he could mean more to the one boy he needs more than anything. Peter is supposed to be fabricating a more durable formula for his webs due to an incident the past week involving him trying to swing on a sharp edged skyscraper and accidentally plummeting ten stories before he managed to catch himself just in time. 
It would be really great if he could focus, too, because Peter would have to list nearly dying due to his webs getting torn to shreds as one of his top ten least favorite things, but he can’t manage it, not in the slightest. Instead, he’s staring hopelessly as Y/N bends over his notes, making careful modifications to some integrated armor circuits that Tony had asked for.
This should be Peter’s happy place. He loves the labs in the Avengers complex. There’s enough whirring machinery and blinking lights to satisfy any overeager STEM kid, and Peter’s the height of the craze in that regard. Peter still has fond memories of the first time he was allowed inside, how he could have spent hours just looking at everything, and what do you mean he can use it for free?
The initial surprise of having the greatest engineering playground at his fingertips has worn away somewhat, but Peter still loves the space like a second home. When Peter found out that Y/N also worked there, well, it seemed like the best coincidence yet.
He had been counting on using shared lab memories as a talking point, but instead, he finds himself in yet another dead end. Y/N is a fantastic worker, by which Peter means that he’s never distracted by Peter’s attempts at conversation. Y/N gets his work done and leaves immediately afterwards, leaving no time for Peter to win the other boy over.
It’s not like you have to be totally focused in here, anyway. It’s a stark contrast to the times Peter has spent in here with Tony, how the billionaire cranks up the music until the beakers are practically rattling on the shelves before going to work. They’ll trade one-liners and bad jokes over tech tips, and Peter doesn’t think he’s ever laughed louder than when they’re just hanging out and fixing things.
With Y/N, though, all is quiet and studious. For some reason, the lab seems smaller when it’s just the two boys, like everything means that much more when Peter’s around someone he needs to impress even more than Mr. Stark. Every sound seems to echo, especially the deafening beat of Peter’s heart in his chest when he accidentally brushes against Y/N’s arm when they’re both reaching for the same tool.
Tony might make the labs feel like the height of scientific discovery, but Y/N makes it all feel right, like this really is Peter’s home. This is where he was always meant to be, out here with his lab partner that won’t talk to him no matter how hard Peter tries.
He’s going to give it another shot today, though. Peter squares his shoulders and directs a casual remark Y/N’s way.
“Did you see the essay prompt Mr. Schumacher posted? Man, it looks hideous.”
Y/N nods once, not even looking up from the metal he’s been fiddling with for the last ten minutes. “Yeah, the one due next week?”
Peter bites back a grimace. “That one exactly. Doesn’t it seem terrible? I mean, who’s got the time to write so many pages on trade? It happened a lot in ancient societies. That’s all you need to say.”
“Yeah,” Y/N says again, and leaves it at that.
Drat. Well, if Peter can’t get him to complain about school, a topic of conversation that usually attracts every other student in the history of ever, maybe he can encourage Y/N to loosen up with a different subject. 
A little while later, what feels like an hour to Peter and is probably just five minutes or so, he tries again.
“Are you going to watch the football game this week?” He asks.
Y/N lifts a shoulder. “Probably not, I’m not much of a sports guy.”
“Me neither,” Peter murmurs. At least he tried.
This makes Y/N break his staring contest with his circuit board at last. “Why’d you ask, then?” He says with a quiet laugh.
Peter shrugs a little too quickly. “I don’t know, I guess it was just something to say.”
“Do you always say things just to say them, Parker?” Y/N prods.
Peter squints, trying to see if Y/N’s teasing him or just asking. “Sometimes,” he says at last, “but only when people aren’t talking much.”
Y/N just shrugs in what could be agreement and turns back to the circuit, reaching in a nearby drawer to grab a new spool of wire. Peter fights the urge to slam his head into the desk in front of him. How could it possibly be this hard to talk to the other boy? He is trying his absolute hardest and getting absolutely nowhere. It’s infuriating.
To be honest, it’s wearing on him quite a bit. Peter’s starting to doubt himself in earnest now. Peter doesn’t know that he could be any more obvious that he wants to talk, and Y/N has to be aware of it by now. If that’s the case, and Y/N still doesn’t want anything to do with Peter, well, maybe that’s on purpose, too.
The words erupt from his throat before Peter can stop them, a hot torrent of self consciousness and desperate anguish.
“Do you really not like me?”
If Peter was surprised that Y/N glanced up once when he asked him a question earlier, he’s stunned by the reaction he gets now. Y/N’s eyes widen and he stares at Peter in complete shock.
“What?” Y/N demands, obviously taken aback, “Where could you possibly get that idea?”
Peter takes a step back, almost startled by the force of the other boy’s response. “Well,” he mutters, “you never answer me when I ask you things. I kind of get the feeling that you just want me to stop talking and leave you alone.”
Y/N shakes his head firmly. “No, it’s not like that in the slightest. You don’t understand.”
“No,” Peter says fervently, “I don’t.”
Y/N sighs, dragging a tired hand across his face as he tries to think of how to best answer the clear war going on inside Peter’s head.
“It’s not like that,” he repeats at last, “I’m not mad at you, not in the slightest. It’s not that I don’t like you, I do. Really, I do. More than you think. It’s just well, I’m not good at this sort of thing. Easy conversation, I mean. I want to reply to you, but by the time I think of what to say back that would make me sound smart or remotely interesting, you’ve already moved on.”
“So you’re saying that I talk too fast?” Peter asks, kind of amused.
“Not exactly, but close enough. I’m just worried that you don’t like me because I’m not as outgoing as you are,” Y/N explains.
Now it’s Peter’s turn for a fierce denial. “Not a chance,” he declares, “I’m only talking this much and this quickly because I want you to like me like–”
Like Peter likes Y/N. Like Peter loves Y/N, that is, but he can’t exactly bring that up now.
Unfortunately, Y/N catches onto this little slip. “Now you’re choosing to hesitate?” He asks pointedly, “If I think you’re holding back now, I’m going to be hurt.”
“It doesn’t matter,” Peter says vaguely. As if there was anything he could have said to make Y/N more interested in hearing what he can’t mention.
“It most certainly does,” Y/N grins, “Peter, you say everything that crosses your mind. You even told me about the time someone gave you churros because you helped defend them from a carjacking. If you’re keeping something from me, it’s got to be something good.”
Distracted for a moment, Peter blinks in surprise. “You remember the time I told you about the churros? I didn’t think you were paying attention.”
“Of course I was paying attention,” Y/N spreads his hands, “It’s like I said, I’m paying attention a lot more than you think. I’m just no good at making it obvious. Guess I–”
Y/N’s voice trails off too, and they’re both left staring at each other, wondering who’s going to be the first to break and say what they’re surely both thinking.
It’s not Peter, as it turns out, it’s both of them. Y/N and Peter both start talking at the same time, their voices overlapping in this slightly frantic need to be heard before it’s too late.
“I like you.”
“I didn’t know how to tell you, but I like you.”
They look at each other for a few moments in surprise, then Y/N bursts out laughing. It’s such an unfamiliar sight compared with his usual quiet tranquility that it makes Peter start laughing too, just out of shock.
“You like me?” He asks when he’s able to control himself at last.
“Yeah,” Y/N says with a smile, “Yeah, I do. Didn’t think you would feel the same, though, not when I couldn’t even muster up the courage to talk to you about things as silly as homework. I thought you were sick of me for sure.”
“I could never be sick of you,” Peter declares, and he knows in his heart that it’s true.
It is rare, then, to find someone who you could want to be around for hours and days and forever. Peter would consider himself lucky to find that someone in Y/N, and to know that Y/N would listen to him for infinity on end and still remember every sentence spoken aloud. They’ve never needed anyone but each other, and that is precisely how they’ll stay so close in the time to come.
marvel tag list: @namoreno, @thatfangirl42, @rogueanschel, @mycosmicparadise, @ellobruv, @caswinchester2000, @with-inked-solace, @sher-lokid7, @amortensie, @23victoria, @watchreadfangirlrepeat, @gods-fools-heroes, @w1shes43
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warmblanketwhump · 3 years ago
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safe enough to fall
a little university-themed thing I wrote using @sicktember prompts: comfort item, sneaky temperature check, medicine, unlikely caregiver, and lightly inspired by these prompts
the grip of the winter’s cold was their constant, unrelenting companion - but sometimes, B just wished it would be a little less faithful.
It doesn’t ease in the morning, when B wakes up coughing with a cold nose and stiff limbs. It stays as B shivers through the lukewarm shower and the hurried layering of clothes over damp, goosebumped skin. It sticks to them like cling wrap on the bus, in the lecture hall, the windy walk to their next class, makes them tense their rattling jaw, and leaves them hunched over and huddled up, desperate to conserve any scrap of heat.
This was a fact of their university existence - that after the pleasant crispness of fall, their poor, scholarship-funded body was plunged into four months of frozen hell. They didn’t like to complain - after all, they were getting a free education. But no one told them how brutal their university’s winters would be, nor that dorm heating was little more than a few puffs of warm air every hour, or that regardless of how many layers they pulled on, they’d be chilled to the bone until late March.
Their final class of the week is in a drafty science lab, and they hold back a groan. The cold's not the only source of their dread - it was the thought of spending 90 minutes with their perky, overly friendly lab partner, A.
A, whose parents were well-off, well-known benefactors of their university. A, who lived in a nice house with proper heating and had the money for a warm winter coat. A, who obliviously chattered on about anything and everything. Besides that, they were just so...happy. All the time.
The can afford to be, B thought miserably. There was no way all that sunshine could be real.
B really tried to tamp down their bitterness, but it was hard to listen to someone gush on about their amazing weekend their family spent on some tropical island when B spent the same weekend wrapped up in blankets, trying to stay warm enough to study their nomenclature notes.
Two minutes before class, A bounds into the lab like a freed golden retriever and begins their usual volley of caffeinated questions, which B responds to in short, clipped answers. Suddenly, the questions stop and A’s brows furrow.
“You look cold. Are you okay?”
B shifts on their stool and tucks their fingers into the sleeves of their worn secondhand coat, pulling it tighter with a shudder. “I am cold. It’s winter.” They cough weakly into their elbow - the nagging cough has gripped them for weeks now.
“Are you sick?”
Direct, then. That was new. “No. At least, I don’t think so. I don’t have a fever or anything.” In truth, they had been feeling a little lower than usual the past couple of days, the chill a little deeper, the aches more pronounced, the cough a bit more painful. But in their book, that was hardly enough call themselves sick. B sniffles and A opens their mouth to comment further, but the professor calls the class to attention, and the moment is gone.
90 minutes later, they’ve got their work cut out for them - a ten-page lab report that’s going to count for nearly a quarter of their final grade. And as luck would have it, it was a partner project, which meant B got to spend more time with the equivalent of human rocket fuel.
“So...do you want to just knock this out tonight?” A's eyes dart around nervously.
B frowns - it’s almost the weekend, and they figured A would have plans with friends this evening. But B sure doesn’t have anything going on., so they don’t protest. “No… I s’pose we should get as much done as possible while it’s still fresh. Want to go to the library?”
“Ugh." A cringes. "Do we have to? That place is like a tomb.”
B huffs indignantly. “It's not that bad," they mumble in a weak defense of their favorite study spot. A shoots them a glare, and B rolls their eyes. "Do you have somewhere better? It's Friday, so most places are closing up.”
“Well, my parents decided to go on some last-minute ski trip to the Alps again, so my place is free," A says as they step out into the biting wind. "Plus, I have a ton of food and it's actually warm in there, unlike these buildings.”
The promise of decent heating and food that wasn't from the dining hall was enough for B. "Fine. Your place." The pair trudge through the bitter wind as the sun begins to set, and soon they arrive at A's parents’ home - a beautiful, winding estate just a couple minutes away from campus. B has to bite their lip to keep their jaw off the ground - in the blustering snow, this place looks straight out of a Christmas card. Another reminder of how they don’t fit in this world.
Will you stop? B chastises themselves. A having money isn't a personal attack on you. Just enjoy the free food, finish the assignment and get over it.
Despite the towering exterior, B's house was quite cozy, colored in warm neutrals and filled with soft, comfortable furniture. Just past the mudroom, they spot a big living room filled with with an enormous overstuffed couch, squashy-looking pillows, and soft throw blankets. Everything about this place screams warm. A rubs their arms, suddenly aware of how cold they are. The heat nearly makes them dizzy, and they can feel the temperature difference as it seeps into their cold skin.
"Want some cocoa?" A tosses their bag into the corner and heads for an electric kettle in the kitchen, and B follows. "It always helps me warm up." B nods. A couple minutes later, A pushes over a steaming mug with the top entirely covered in marshmallows.
B wraps their chilled fingers around the mug and takes a sip, and the warm, rich liquid feels like heaven to their cold body. "That's amazing."
A smiles. "It's the good stuff." They sip in a surprising silence for a few moments, before A sighs in resignation. "As much as I wish this was just a social call, this report isn't gonna write itself." They grab a bag of popcorn and nod their head toward the living room, and B follows dutifully. A flicks on the gas fireplace and tosses B a throw blanket, and the pair gets to work.
------------------------------
After a couple hours of studying, three instances of indignantly thrown popcorn, and a dramatic reading of the periodic table, B realized that they may have misjudged A. Deep down, under the bubbly exterior, A was a genuinely kind, sweet person. It wasn't an act - they just were human sunshine. And the longer they spent time with them, the more B realized they didn't mind their company at all.
"Alright." A drops their pencil and rubs their eyes. "If I have to balance one more equation, my brain's gonna explode. Study break time." A flips on the TV and puts the volume on low.
B leans their head back on the couch and pulls their throw blanket to their chin, trying to ward off the shivery feeling in their core. Despite the heat of the fire, the mug of hot chocolate, and the thick blanket, they just can’t seem to get warm.
Their face feels hot, but their blood feels chilled and heavy, the weight of it making them ache deep down in their bones. B wraps their arms around their knees, trying to rub away the throbbing pain and get some warmth into their skin. They glance out the picture window at the now-blowing snow. It's gonna be a miserable walk home.
"B, you're shivering." A's turning to look at them now.
B startles. "It's-It's nothing. Just a chill." The concern in A's voice triggers their flight response. "I....I should probably get back to the dorms. It’s late–" They're cut off with a hacking cough that leaves them breathless and they wince at the ache in their chest.
"B, it's snowing, and you haven't even had dinner-"
"Where's my jacket?" They push themselves up and toss the throw blanket off, instantly regretting it as the air invades their pocket of hard fought warmth. They’re trembling and dizzy and desperately freezing, but they cannot stay here. Then, the world tilts and they fall back on to the couch. For a moment, they're just laying in an icy, spinning world, trying to catch their breath, when warmth suddenly envelops them.
A's tucking the same thick grey blanket around their shivering form. As they pull away, their hand lightly brushes over B's neck, then freezes. B twists away from the gentle touch, but it’s too late. Realization floods over A's face. Caught. "You lied. You are sick."
B groans, even as their fingers weave into the chunky knit and pull the warm layer closer. "A, please. Just let me go home. I'm probably contagious. You don't want me here."
"B, you look like death warmed over. I'm not sending you out in a blizzard when you're feverish like this. I won't do it." There's a spark in their eyes and a set to A's jaw that dares B to challenge them.
B leans back, defeated. Even though they want nothing more than to run out of this room, they're too weak to stand and too cold to move. So here they'll stay.
It's okay. Someone's here. You can give in now.
No. I can't. I can't let them see me like this.
What choice do you have? You already look awful. Let them help you.
A covers them with another blanket and places a gentle hand on their back, rubbing slowly. The firelight flickers, casting light and shadow across their solemn face. “B. Tell me what you're feeling, and I'll get you what you need.”
B swallows down the rising panic, the helpless vulnerability they feel, and takes a shallow, shaky breath. “I…I guess I just feel….not right. I’m always cold...but it's...worse.” They sniffle weakly, trying to still and order their swirling thoughts. “Chills, fever, cough, sore throat, kinda stuffed up. And it just hurts everywhere.”
A nods slowly, then leaves the room. They return in a few minutes with a few small bottles, carefully scanning the labels and holding them up for B to see.
“Can you take this? Any problems with this one?” B had to take a moment and match the brand names with their usual knockoff brands, but soon they had a couple over the counter medicines picked out, along with something for their cough.
A glances at the medicine labels once more. "This one says to take with food. I've got some leftover chicken and dumpling soup I can heat up - does that sound okay?"
B nods almost imperceptibly. "Sounds wonderful." A gets up to heat the soup, and B feels the anxiety rising in their stomach when they're not in the room with them. A returns with a mug and manages to gently spoon a few sips of broth into B's mouth before B starts falling asleep, clutching the grey blanket even tighter to their shoulders.
A smiles sadly. “That blanket's my favorite whenever I'm not feeling good. It's the best thing you could have to fight off what you’ve got. Trust me.”
B curls into the soft fabric. It was as if the warm environment of the apartment and the comfort of the blanket had been a signal that it was safe to leave survival mode, rest for a moment, open the floodgates that had been holding back whatever had been ailing them for weeks.
After B takes their medicine, A’s eyes shift awkwardly around the room. “So….when you’re sick, do you like having someone with you? Or do you want to be by yourself?”
A sudden rush of emotion crashes over B. They’d so rarely had the choice. It takes all they’ve got not to throw themselves around A and beg them not to leave. “Stay, please,” they ask in a small, trembling voice. “If it’s not too much trouble.”
A smiles halfway and gently pats B’s leg. “Seeing as how I live here, I don’t think that’ll be a problem.” They take their spot at the end of the couch and pull B’s legs over their own, flicking the TV to a familiar movie. B tries to keep up with the plot, but they keep falling in and out of a fitful, restless sleep, tossing, turning, unable to get comfortable enough.
When B’s about ready to cry from exhaustion, A’s there, covering them up with another blanket, bringing them a glass of water, gently stroking the damp hair off their forehead before laying a cold cloth over it. They flinch at first, but the cool dampness eases the fire of their fever, even for just a moment. The last thing B remembers before falling unconscious is a gentle hand squeezing theirs.
It could be minutes or hours later when they jolt awake from a fever dream in a cold sweat, choking and coughing. They’ve kicked off their blankets and the cloth is nowhere to be found, but the chills are back in full force. A appears in B’s blurred vision, hand held to B’s forehead. “Poor thing. Your fever’s worse,” they murmur.
B’s still gasping for breath, curled up in the fetal position, body wracked by the shakes as they try force the words through their chattering teeth. “A...It's so cold. I’m so scared.”
If B was more lucid, they’d see something in A’s eyes crack wide open at their weak, fearful cries. A pulls the trusted grey blanket from the floor and wraps it back around B, rubbing their arms to try and make them feel warmer. There's something in the tenderness of the gesture, and B’s panicked gasps turn into soft, quiet sobs. They try and cover their face with one hand, but A’s hand is there, catching their wrist and wiping the tears away with their thumb.
“Hey. You’re gonna be okay. We just gotta get through tonight, alright?” A’s voice matches their usual cheery demeanor, but B can see the fear in their own eyes. They don’t know what they’re doing either.
“Why are you helping me?” B whispers in a tear-roughened voice.
A shrugs. "You're sick. You need help. Is it that so surprising?"
B's eyes flash a delirious spark. "You don't get it. I'm a broke scholarship student. I'm nothing like you. I'm not fun, or bubbly, or rich, or any of those things you are, and I don't fit in here. So why?"
B can't stop the words now, every single insecurity laid bare. "Why do you try to talk to me when I'm nothing but rude to you? Why'd you invite me here? Am I just a project to you? Why are you helping me? I'm not worth it!" The words spill out before B can stop them, and the raw hurt in A's eyes nearly rips B's heart out of their chest.
B claps their hand over their mouth, tears flooding their eyes. Now they've done it. They've laid it all out there. A's gonna kick them to the curb. And B won't blame them one bit.
But instead, A just looks at them, and pulls B into a hug. Their voice wavers only a bit as they whisper in B's ear: "You're not a project. You are completely worth being cared for. And you’re not the only one who knows what it feels like to not fit somewhere. Trust me.”
Alone. In a big, empty house. Studying on a Friday night. No plans of their own.
A, are you lonely, too?
Their words are so simple.
And yet they're everything B didn't know they needed to hear. A's got one arm around their shoulders, and one hand threaded through their sweaty, fever-damp hair, and they're cradling B so tightly it’s like they're the one who needs to be held.
B can't find the words to apologize or comfort them back. They're too tired for that. But they wrap their other arm around A and let their head rest on their shoulder. They stay like that for ages until their head begins to drop, and A shifts so they’re both laying down, B curled against A, A’s arm wrapped around their shoulders as they tuck a blanket around them both.
And finally, finally, B lets go. It's safe to fall, this time around. Because for the first time, there's someone there to catch them.
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partnersincrimesuau · 3 years ago
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PARTNERS IN CRIME - Stevinel SU Fan Comic Chapter 1: A Change of Plans Page No. 61
First Previous Next
Top Ten Questions SCIENCE STILL CAN’T ANSWER: How Spinel commands the Injector to do things with her shapeshifting hand trick. (oh well, i guess it leaves it to the fans to headcanon when we write comics about it >:3)
So the Injector is leaving the Earth’s crust, leaving it almost entirely unscathed. Everyone on Earth has been spared. Except of course, the oblivious amnesiac who has no idea what’s truly going on, and the rejuvenated crystal gems, still idle on the hill below the lighthouse.
Info about PIC here.
(Made in FireAlpaca) Steven Universe is owned by Rebecca Sugar
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fandomwriterstuff · 3 years ago
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“We’re a well-oiled team of military-grade kindergarteners,” his best friend, and the only other human on the ship who would understand what kindergarten was, continued chastising him and his companions. “The level of education and training among the three of you eclipses that of the entire rest of the members of this operation,” Annabeth continued, pointing her finger individually at himself, his pilot Jason, and his Chief Science Officer Nico. “You know, I’m not that surprised with you, Percy, but you are our XO so you should really be more responsible,” he winced at that, still feeling a bit of imposter syndrome at being the Commander of the USS Olympus. “Jason, shouldn’t you be piloting a ship or something?” At that, he saluted her and did an about face before scampering off to get into more trouble. “And you, you’re definitely way too responsible to have gotten mixed up with this Seaweed Brain and Sparky, so what’s in this tomfoolery for you?”
Nico, the only Neptunian on the ship, shifted his large black wings self consciously under the scrutiny of their Chief of Operations. Percy, as the Commander of the vessel, felt obligated to protect his usually stoic and well-behaved… acquaintance? Di Angelo was reserved, almost standoffish, and resented anyone who tried to stick up for him for some reason, but that didn’t stop Percy’s stupid seaweed brain from doing so. Hence the acquaintance. Percy was 99% sure Di Angelo didn’t consider him a friend. But he was nice to Percy and a great officer, so Percy considered him his friend.
“It was my fault, Annie,” he used her childhood nickname carefully, not knowing whether it would soften her up or piss her off more. He was hoping for softening. “It was just another one of Jason and my dumb ideas that we thought we would need a scientist to help with, and we didn’t want to piss off Leo by involving him in it. You know how he is about his engineer and warp cores and whatnot,” Percy held his hands up placatingly. “Leave Di Angelo out of this, he has sciencey things to do, isn’t that right?” Percy side-eyed his companion who (not surprisingly) rolled his eyes.
“I try not to get involved with human pranks or even Jovian mischief, but Officer Grace and First Officer Jackson were about to be meddling with my linguistics team. It isn’t my duty to tell my superiors what to do, so I sought out the next best option, supervising and ensuring no lasting damage was done to the physical or emotional state of the linguistics team. Now,” Here Percy held in a smirk as Di Angelo shrugged. “If they caused interference with the machinery of the ship, that wouldn’t be my expertise, so I allowed it to happen and-” Percy held back a laugh as the other male started speaking even faster to get everything out as Annabeth turned redder and redder. “I’m very sorry about that, truly, but I had no control over the situation.”
“No control over the situation? You three broke our LIT machine and now we have to go back to Earth as soon as we pass close enough to fix it. Soon enough nobody on this ship will understand each other,” the woman across from them crossed her arms and Percy shrunk back a bit.
“I want to make a joke about a machine being called “LIT,” but I feel like it isn’t the right time,” he muttered. “I know the Linguistic Inhibition Technology is important, but most of us have a working understanding of at least one other language, so it shouldn’t be a huge issue, right?”
“You know it works by connecting to the implant technology in our brains, so as it shuts down one by one, members of this ship from spaces stations and planets far and wide will have no clue why they suddenly can’t understand their XO, or their Chief Officer, or their best friend. So you better explain this. And you have to tell them that we’re going straight back to Earth to fix it because no nearby planets have the same brain implant tech as us. Damn Terrans and their brand name technology copyrights,” Annabeth grumbled and finally turned around to walk off.
“Hey, you’re Terran, too!” Percy shouted after her, but she just flipped him the bird.
“She can do that?” Di Angelo asked, side-eyeing Percy.
“Yeah, she’s been my best friend since we were twelve. As long as she doesn’t undermine my authority in front of everyone else, I don’t really care. I’ve done way worse to her,” Percy laughed at the other man’s frown. “Nothing bad, just pranks and things of that sort. Maybe when we get back to Earth we can show you where we’re from. You never set foot off of the training grounds while you were in school.”
“I would… like that,” Di Angelo paused and gave Percy a soft smile.
“Great,” Percy patted the younger male on the shoulder and made his way to the Command Center.
Percy sat himself down in the rotating chair and pressed on the comms device.
“Gooooood evening crew of the USS Olympus, this is your Commanding Officer, Percy Jackson, speaking,” he smiled at the engineering crew that was scuttling by, only for one of them to pause and look at him like he was speaking a different language… Whoops.
“There was a malfunction with the Linguistic Inhibition Technology and we will be returning to Earth henceforth to repair it before the damage becomes problematic. You may experience glitches with your implant technology and may revert to only understanding your first language and those you have studied extensively. If somebody looks like they’re not understanding what I’m saying right now, please escort them to the linguistics team in Science Bay 3. Carry on. Jackson, out.” He clicked again and the mic turned off.
He sighed, this would be one of his bigger mistakes. They were supposed to be exploring, but they couldn’t do that if nobody could speak to one another. One trip home couldn’t hurt him, and he was sure Annabeth would be happy to see her father.
It wasn’t until later after the Chief Officer meeting when someone finally asked Percy about Earth. For many of the non-humans on the ship, Earth was a place to get education and training to go out in the star fleet, and they never set foot outside the campus grounds, just like Di Angelo. But people had stopped asking him questions because Earth was basically “Space Australia,” as Annabeth had explained to him. The adaptability of humans and their need to pack bond astounded many and horrified many others. So, he stopped talking about home.
It was a new member of their ship, Novax (a Vulcan who was a part of Leo’s engineering team), who asked him about it first.
“I hear Earth is 75% made of pure salt water, and is filled with animals of all kinds. Do you have a favorite water animal?” he asked Percy excitedly.
“Definitely dolphins, though they aren’t underwater creatures. Like humans they need oxygen to breathe, and come up for air very often. My favorite actual underwater species would have to be a hippocampus from Neptune. I’ve always wanted to go and see one, but my human anatomy prevents me from going on-planet,” Percy explained and sipped on his hot tea.
“There are a million creatures in the ocean and you pick one that doesn’t breathe underwater?” Clarisse grunted. His Chief Tactical Officer was a brutish Martian, but very specialized in weapons. “And your second favorite isn’t even Terran.”
“What else do you know about the ‘ocean’?” Novax breathed, leaning forward.
“Eh, not much,” Percy shrugged.
“I’m not sure I heard that correctly, maybe my LIT unit isn’t functioning well,” another member of engineering asked, Nyssa. “Your planet is 75% water and you don’t even know what is inside it?”
“I could tell you about the people who spend their life learning about what survives in the deep depths,” Percy looked up, knowing he had all of the non-Terrans hooked on every word. Even Di Angelo had paused in his note taking and was staring wide-eyed at Percy. “But I don’t know if you’d want to know.”
“No we do!” Nyssa exclaimed. “There are people who dedicate their lives to a place that’s literally not navigable by humans, the main inhabitants of the planet?”
“Well as you said, most of the planet is water. Which means that coastal communities are filled with fisherman, whalers, swimmers, and more. I could tell you about some of those. I could also tell you about the scientists that spend years of their lives building bots that can’t even come close to withstanding the pressure at the deepest depths without imploding, or I could tell you about those that do come close,” he shrugged.
“What happened to those?”
“The video feed cut out after only seeing multiple rows of sharp, jagged teeth,” Annabeth answered, her sharp grin frightening those who hadn’t noticed her. Some forgot that she was Terran, because she was also half Minervan.
“I could tell you about whales. Beautiful, they come in black and white or grey or blue. But they can be as big as almost 100 feet long. That’s as long as most pirate ships. And they could fit about 400 average sized humans in their mouths. You don’t want to cross one of them. And they only live on the surface. The things that live in the deep,” Percy shuddered for effect. There were no Neptunians on the ship, so there were no natural water dwellers there, so all of his rapt listeners were shocked by this information. “There’s the anglerfish. They light up the dark with an antenna on top of their heads, and the light lures in prey. But it’s so dim elsewhere that you don’t see their big sharp teeth until you’re right up against them,” he murmured. “Giant squids are almost as big as whales but not nearly as peaceful and beautiful. They have eight arms and two tentacles that could wrap around any boat and crush it.”
“Ten limbs?” Nyssa whispered, clearly disturbed.
“Plus, the Portuguese Man o’ War,” Percy shrugged nonchalantly. “Also known as the floating terror. It’s like a big blue jellyfish that sits innocently on top of the water with huge blue tentacles that sit just underneath with a sting strong enough to kill a full grown human.”
“Don’t worry,” Annabeth grinned that shark grin again. “Percy won’t tell you about the stories of the old days. He doesn’t want to scare you.”
“That was the not scary part?” Novax gulped.
“Anyway, I just got notified that we’ll be back on Earth in a few days, so brace yourselves,” and with that, she stood and left them all staring after her. When the door clicked shut, Percy had all eyes back on him. He shrugged.
“Don’t look at me. I wasn’t going to tell you about the kr- nevermind,” he stood. “Di Angelo, with me,” the younger officer stood, back to business and was at Percy’s side again in a moment. “Clear your schedule, you’re spending shore leave with me, pal.”
“Great,” came the deadpan reply.
“Don’t sound so somber,” Percy rolled his eyes. “I’m just going to show you the beach and maybe a good gay bar. You need to let off some steam my dude.”
The other male reddened.
“That is so… That is…” he huffed. “Highly inappropriate.” he glared down at the ground and Percy felt a little bad, maybe the guy wasn’t out? But it was clear he had a preference for males. Oh well, that foot was already in Percy’s mouth.
“Fine. But I will be attending and I am a great dancer so you’re missing out,” he winked at the flustered officer and made his way back to his cabin. It would be an interesting few days.
He made a plan with Annabeth. Day one before shore leave, Percy would spread a rumor to Novax about the kraken. Bigger than a giant squid and meaner. Known to crush entire pirate ships in the olden days.
Day two, Annabeth would mention sirens to Nyssa. Hideous creatures that could lure you in with their voices and lead you to believe you were bringing your ship in to everything you ever wanted, when in reality you would crash your ships and then drown.
Day three, Percy would tell Leo about the Megalodon. A definitely very real shark so big you couldn’t even imagine it. Percy shuddered at that one.
“But, there are some good things,” Percy was speaking to Nico Di Angelo from his Commander chair, in ear shot of some of the participants of the conversation a few nights prior. “Mermaids, the siren’s nicer cousin species. And the lost city of Atlantis. Known to be a great and bountiful city, lost to the sea and cursed by the gods to be stuck down there forever. Some believe it still exists, but it’s within the Bermuda Triangle.”
“What, pray tell, is the Bermuda Triangle,” Clarisse sighed.
“Hard to explain. Ships just… go in… and they never come out,” Annabeth shrugged. “Planes go down. Ships wreck. People who go in don’t come back out, so we don’t know if Atlantis is really there or not.”
“That’s… terrifying,” Novax whispered as he walked by.
Percy was sure he had created a healthy fear of Earth’s oceans in his crew. And he meant to, because while he loved the beach and swimming, he did want to make them shy away from the depths. They wouldn’t do well to explore it.
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luimagines · 4 years ago
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Coul I request the chain reacting to meeting the reader who is Wild's sibling? (If background is needed shrieks science and them whatever purchase did so the reader is just sorta- 15-28 )
Masterlist
I don't understand the second sentence but I think I can infer what you're trying to say. And even then, I came up with a backstory that more less fixes it regardless so yay!
Wild is everyone's favorite chaotic creative sibling!
And I went for older sibling because reasons and just assume that sibling! Reader is in their early twenties.
Content under the cut!
You woke up one day in Hateno village, quietly aware of the silence that echoed through your house.
You miss your brother.
Not that he was here often with his Goddess given assignment nor did he even know who you were for the first half of it.
What a day that was.
Your little brother back from the dead, scars and all and then some... but he had no idea who you were.
It hurt to say the least. But you were told it would happen once the news reached you. He would wake up one day to finish his duty but he would not remember anything regarding his past life.
Even when he found you again, after he somehow remembered you, you didn’t know where to begin.
You just knew that you were so happy to be together again after so long that you hugged him as tight as you could and told him that your door was always open.
To say you both cried is the understatement of the century. It was wet and ugly and messy and neither of you really talk about it but it felt good that day.
And while you both knew he couldn’t stay for long with his adventure being no where near complete. He did come home for the night after he set that travel medallion of his by the front door.
But that was then- before the Calamity was defeated.
Now that it’s gone- so is your brother. Again.
On a different quest this time, it seems.
You don’t understand why your baby brother of all people has to be the one to do it and you would like nothing more than to wrap him up in a blanket and shield him from anything else that comes to hurt him- but he never let you do that as a child- let alone now.
You begin the day like any other and try to get as many mundane chores done as you can before you finally try and get the stable in the back fixed up.
You noticed Link had an affinity to horses and had checked in with the nearest stable to see that he had some lodged under his name.
There’s a place at the house, darn it. Lodge them here. It just needs to be fixed.
With your goal in mind, you lose yourself to the work and the time passes effortlessly.
It’s around noon by the time you hear it.
The familiar sound of activation that gets your heart pounding in relief and unbridled joy.
You drop your hammer and run to the front of the house with the largest grin on your face. “You’re back, you Rug Rat! Come here!”
You single him out instantly amongst the group and tackle him in a hug.
He’s long stopped trying to fight on you on this and has also returned your crushing hug with one of his own. “I’m back.”
“You brought friends too.” You grin and give the group a two fingered salute. “And here I was afraid that this loner child would end up dead in a ditch somewhere and I would be none the wiser. Thank you for looking after my little brother. I’m aware he’s a handful.”
“Ok thanks.” He says.
“Little brother?” Someone from the group asks. They’re lost amongst the sea of head but you nod regardless.
“Yup. I remember the day he was born like it was yesterday.” You grin and put your hands on your hips, introducing yourself right after. “Any friend of Link’s is a friend of the family. Come in, come in. Make yourselves at home. It’s not much but it’s ours. Been in the family since before the calamity struck. Let me wash up a bit and then we can get some food going, yeah?”
“I’ll start up the stove.” Link says and you’re about to disagree. After all, he just got home and should rest while he can but he ahs the most unburdened smile on his face that you can’t bring yourself to deny him.
 “Alright.” You sigh and head to the back where the shower is. It’s always been small and a bit cramped and the door stopped fitting correctly about ten years ago but now that’s it’s not just you anymore, you can go around into the giving the house the TLC it deserves.
But you’re starting with the stable in the back.
When you’re finished and you’ve dried yourself off, you get into the house to find it in a delightful array of colors and chaos.
Each of the boys seemed to have made themselves completely at home in the time you were gone and you leaned against the door frame, watching them all interreact.
Your brother didn’t waste any time with getting the stove up and running. You can smell the beginning of lunch getting cooked and it appears that Link has wrangled two of the boys to be his helpers. One appears to be the youngest with bright wide eyes and a similar blue tunic to that of Links and the other looks to be  slightly more timid in the process. He’s around the same height as Link but darker hair and a long white cape still clasped around his shoulders. 
You recognize the Master Sword strapped to his back.
Making a note of that you look around the room again. Three of them have made themselves comfortable at the table. One is easily the biggest guy of the group, red and blue tattoos on his face and scar over his eye as he watches the others go about the admittedly small house. The other two look to be the same size and you’re sure you can look them in the eye if you needed to. They’re talking to both each other and the group that’s cooking. One has a wolf pelt on his shoulder with more tattoos on his face and other is a knight if you’ve ever seen one with a bright blue scarf around his neck.
You’re not one to judge your brother’s friends but you make a mental note to watch him in case he tries anything.
Two of the boys- one with pink hair and the other have the most solid brown mane of the whole group have made themselves spares and are talking quietly to each other and not making a fuss.
The final one looks to be the smallest but he’s got an older glint to his eye that recognize well. He’s wearing arguably the most color tunic of the group with those four patches sewn together. He’s tucked himself away into a corner with a book out, not interacting with either of them outright but he has been looking up and adding his two cents to the older’s conversation at the table.
They don’t notice you’re back which is a testament to how tired they all must be.
They’re an interesting bunch.
But Link did always surround himself with interesting people.
So you’re not really surprised.
“Sooo...” Pinky starts off, calling your bother’s attention. “You have an older sibling?”
“Yup!” He answers, not looking up from the pot. “They were waiting for me the whole time, and even manage to keep the house. Up keep still needs to be done but we’ve been working on it together.”
“But they’re older.”
“Yes. We’ve established this.”
You have to hold back your snort.
“You were asleep for one hundred years.” Four Patches speaks up, closing his book silently. ”Shouldn’t they... ummm...”
“Be dead?”
“Or at least really old?” Mr. Brunette hops in, trying to lessen the blow of the sentence.
“You’re like one hundred and seven teen right? Wouldn’t that put them at being one hundred and twenty something?” Wolf boy offers.
“I guess so. Yeah. They were old at some point.” Link stops stirring and you can see him try to run the numbers in his head. “I know that much. The village talks about them being really old sometimes, but I guess that was years ago because it’s only from the older folk that live here.”
“But they lived through those one hundred years, didn’t they?” Blue Baby Face speaks this time.
“That’s what they told me.”
“So....” The knight tilts his head and tries to put his hands out as if that would help answer the question. “They’re like the Old Man then? Old in their head but young on the outside.”
“You can say that, yeah.” You say and take extreme satisfaction at the way most of the jump at your voice. “Unlike Link, I was alive the whole time he was asleep. I’ve got grandkids in Lurelin and they visit from time to time but someone had to at least keep the house up and running, might as well have been me.”
“I...” Link starts as he takes the food off the burner. “I never asked you how you stayed young, did I?”
“Nope.”
“Oh.” He looks away and deflates a little. Link looks a little disappointed with himself and that won’t stand in this house.
“I didn’t realize it was that important. And I’m going to assume you’ve explained most of the situation Rug Rat.” You laugh a little with a raised eyebrow. “You can blame Purah. You know she wanted to find a way to keep the old from aging, right? It’s why she’s in the body of a little kid again. But when she tried the second formula she realized that if she tried it on herself that it might as well but poof her back into a baby and she wanted to contact Robbie but he’s too far and too old to make that trip. I volunteered.”
“Really?”
“It still didn’t really work, I was transformed into a teenager instead of a child- a horrible time to exist really. But I suppose it was a blessing in disguise. By the time this one-” You step into the house fully and ruffle Link’s hair. “-came back, it left us with the same age gap as before. So in the end I can’t complain.”
“Why’d you volunteer?” Cape guy leans on the wall. “There’s only so many times you can test it, right? Who’s to say it wouldn’t have been worse?”
“Yeah, what if it did transform you into a baby again and you forgot everything?” Four Patches stands up and comes to stand by the table, putting his book on top of it. 
“I wanted to take the risk.” you shrug and pull your brother into a hug. “Is it a crime to want to see my baby brother again not matter the cost?”
“Get off.” He whines.
You laugh but do as he asks. “It was never said when he’d be back. Only that he would. I was willing to buy as much time as needed to be there for him.”
“I didn’t remember you...” He mutters to himself.
“You now, don’t you?” You punch him gently. “We’ve talked about this. It’s ok. I knew it was going to happen. It wasn’t going to stop me. Ganon himself couldn’t properly get rid of me. I’m not leaving your side anytime soon.”
He smiles and turns to hug you.
“Now where’s your wolf friend?” You ask. “Are you still traveling together? There’s something I wanted to give him.”
Wolf Pelt shimmies in his seat for a second but you don’t think much of it.
Link shakes his head. “Not right now but he has been coming by every now and then.”
“Well it’s good he’s still around to look after you then in my stead.”
“We have a horse though.” Link tilts his head up to grin at you. “It’s not the same but her name is Epona.”
Familiarity stabs you in the heart and you know it’s something that Link even remember even if he lives another one hundred years.
He was too little when she passed.
“...Like dad’s old horse. Can I see her?” You say with a light constriction in your throat. “How crazy would it be if they looked alike?”
“Dad had a horse?”
“You wouldn’t remember her, you were too little. I barely remember her as it is but yes, he did.” You take a step back and motion back towards the door. “Maybe after lunch you show me. We can bring her to the back and measure up how the stable is. I’ve been fixing it up.”
“Really!?” Link blinks, an excited glint appearing in his eyes.
“Yes. That’s what I was doing when you first came in. But let’s eat first.” You put your hand to the small of his back and push him gently in the direction of the table. “And then you can tell me about your friends and this new adventure of yours.”
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desperatecheesecubes · 2 years ago
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🌻 (though you do this anyway)
Why in the fuck does my washer have two different lint traps? Is it because it’s a washer/dryer combo??? Do the two machines need to inherently trap lint in a different manner? One is a dry lint trap and one is a wet trap so???? Maybe???? Top ten questions science still can’t answer
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moonbeambucky · 4 years ago
Text
I Promise (Part 1/2)
Pairing: Chris Beck x Reader Word Count: 4106 Warnings: fluff, smut, pregnancy
Summary: Before heading to Mars Chris Beck reconnects with his best friend, unaware of the outcome of their night together. With the burden of his mission will Chris make a promise he can’t keep?
A/N: My first Chris Beck fic! Rather than a really long one shot I’m splitting it into two parts. A big thank you to my love Allie @all1e23​​​ for beta reading 🍕❤️ gif source (x)
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“Hey.”
The soft resonance of Chris’ voice brings tears to your eyes, ones you couldn’t help from slipping out. They fall down the curve of your cheeks past the uneasy smile you wore.
“I kept my promise,” he said. Chris flashed the top row of his bright white teeth, his mouth curving into a boyish smile that reached his eyes, the fine lines crinkling around them. He tilted his head as he looked at you through the screen, a comforting gaze that made you feel as if he was there with you. 
The quality of the video chat is near perfect making you almost forget Chris was millions of miles away. He looked the same, not that you expected him to look different. It had only been a few months since you last saw each other. 
His hair looks darker than usual but you suppose it’s the low lighting of the small room he’s in. He’s bundled up in a thick NASA sweatshirt and you can see several more layers he has on beneath the collar. Chris looks tired but that’s expected, what he’s doing right now is not a walk in the park. You know it’s the reason why it’s taken so long for him to contact you but you wish he did it sooner. 
More tears flood your eyes, burning their way out as you wished he never left at all. You can barely hear Chris over the sound of your own sobs.
“Please don’t cry,” he pleaded.
You lifted your head towards the screen and seeing the concern on his face only made you miss him more, wishing he was there to console you in person.
Your hand swept away tears from your cheek as your voice cracked saying his name. “Chris…” 
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The streets are simmering with the heat of a summer that couldn’t wait to officially start. Calendars be damned, it was hot. You indulged in a cool shower when you got home from work but time didn’t allow for a languid evening of staying in your towel as you applied serums and moisturizers, lotions and creams and every other post-shower pampering you normally do. Tonight was dinner with a friend and you needed to get ready.
Chatter filled the air of the patio, a small secluded outdoor space at the back of an Italian restaurant on the Upper East Side. It had an Old World Tuscan feel, from the stucco walls that looked purposely imperfect. Green patina shutters hung beside a wrought iron lantern that glowed in the early evening. Lush greens and bright flowers sat atop the half wall that surrounded the dining area making you forget you were in the city.
Chris looked the same, not that you expected him to be different. It had only been about two years since you’ve seen each other, right before he began training for his mission and now you can’t believe it was about to happen. Never would you have expected that the little boy down the block who became your best friend would actually be going to Mars.
For most of your lives you were in the same school, starting in Mrs. Kramer’s kindergarten class where you stuck together; two kids that were nervous about making friends and finding comfort in each other. As the years went on you weren’t always in the same classes but your friendship continued to grow. Chris was picked on for having a girl as a best friend and the girls always teased that he was your “boyfriend.” It never felt that way with Chris. He was your friend first and you never saw him as anything more. 
By the time you were in middle school Chris was already taking advanced classes in math and science and the only class you had together was art which he was famously terrible at. It was there you asked him a huge favor, whispering to him at the sink as you rinsed off your paint brushes. “Could you kiss me?” Chris turned as red as a boiling lobster, immediately sweating as if he was being roasted alive himself. It was later that day walking home from school that you clarified what you meant.
There was a boy, Justin Kaufman, who was the coolest kid in your grade. You had a crush on him like everyone else and you were shocked when he asked if you would go with him to the dance on Friday. You were worried he might try to kiss you and being inexperienced made you nervous. Justin was really popular and if you were a bad kisser then the whole school would know it. Chris was your friend, someone you trusted, someone you could practice with just to make sure you didn’t make a fool of yourself. 
You had no frame of reference for kissing back then apart from one sided smooches to pictures of movie stars that you had a crush on. But feeling Chris’ lips press back against yours was… nice. The best part about it was that things didn’t feel awkward after. Chris was still your best friend and nothing changed. 
A server hands you a menu and you thank him, scanning through it to see what you might be interested in. Chris looks up at the same time you do, wondering if you wanted an appetizer.  You nodded letting him choose, considering the limited food options he’ll have for over the next year. 
“Can you drink?”
Chris’ nose crinkled as he smiled. “In space? No. Tonight? Yes,” he chuckled softly. 
Two glasses of red wine were set on the table as you indulged in delicious food, catching up as much as you could before Chris’ mission. 
“So you’d love what happened today,” you began, leaning closer, “We filmed a restoration video and yours truly was in it.”
Chris’ eyes lit up as he gasped. “I love those! You have to send it to me. Hopefully I can see it before I go. What was it?”
“A sixteenth century European oil painting.” You went into detail and Chris loved listening to your knowledge of art history. It was no wonder that was your major, taking your studies further to work as a conservator at the Met.
Chris swallowed his food quickly to speak. “You were always good at that– art, attention to detail. Remember when we had to sculpt our own faces?” he chuckled.
There was a short burst of laughter as you remembered that day from so long ago. “Yes! Thankfully the real you doesn’t look anything like that abomination you made.” 
Chris drops his head down to hide a bashful smile that mixed in with laughter. He’s enjoying himself, catching up with you, eating. This was so good. He couldn’t help but scoop up another forkful of pasta, not expecting you to ask him a question. “So, how are you feeling?”
He paused to reflect and wiped a bit of sauce from the corner of his mouth. “I’m nervous… excited.” Taking a sip of wine, he sets the glass down carefully on the table. Chris’ face has grown more serious. “My mom’s worried.”
“Of course she is, I don’t blame her. I’m worried. Mars is… well it’s Mars! It’s not around the block.”
He chuckled. “No, it’s definitely not.” 
Chris is heading home to Connecticut tomorrow to spend the next few days with his parents. Chloe, his younger sister is coming in as well so they can all spend some time together before he has to fly down to Florida.
“Then it’s go for launch!” he said with a beaming smile, though Chris had to correct himself for the sake of accuracy. Once he’s down there the crew has to quarantine for at least ten days and go through a bunch of pre-flight checkups and procedures first. “Are you gonna watch?”
The incredulous look you gave him answered his question. “Did you really have to ask? Of course I’m going to watch the launch.” 
His eyes twinkled as he smiled back at you. “Oh and don’t worry I put you on my contact list so you can send me emails. Not sure how quickly I'll get them since CAPCOM directs it back to us. And as long as we have the right satellite coverage we can even do video calls.”
“Like Facetime?”
“In theory yeah, more like space Skype,” he laughed. “It’ll be nice to stay in touch.”
Your smile was bright in the dimness of the evening. You can’t imagine not staying in touch with Chris. The longest you had ever gone was during his Air Force training. He checked in with his parents when he first arrived and from then on it was sporadic. You were able to send him letters though and tried to write him every week though your own schooling and an apprenticeship at the Louvre had taken up a lot of time but that was how your relationship was. 
No matter where you were in life, across the world or hovering above it in the International Space Station, you always kept in touch. It’ll be harder now considering he’s going farther than ever before but you’ll make it work. 
Chris would be back by next November and his mom was already planning a big party for his return, one he’s certain you’ll be invited to. Though you haven’t seen his parents in a while you still kept in touch with them from time to time seeing as they were still friends with your own parents.
“It’s crazy to think you’re about to go to Mars.” 
Chris swipes a palm down his mouth, leaning his elbows against the table as he muses, “I know. Feels like I got the call yesterday.”
It was a night similar to this one, where Chris was in New York celebrating with you and other friends on his selection to be part of the Ares III mission. He had been working at NASA for a few years, doing biomedical research in their center in Virginia and now he was about a month out from spending two years training for his long term mission to Mars. 
He stayed at your apartment that night, continuing the celebration in your own private way. You had come a long way from learning to kiss with Chris. It wasn’t a big deal, neither was it the first time you had sex with each other. It was a special dynamic that worked for the two of you, one you don’t think you could have pulled off with anyone else. With Chris you had trust that was built up over the years. He was safe, he was your friend and this was nothing more than just sex. 
It didn’t happen too often, a couple of times here and there. You both dated a few people over the years and even though you were single at the moment you thought about the promise you made to each other as teens. “If we’re not married to other people by the time we’re thirty let’s promise we’ll marry each other.” Such a silly promise but thirty seemed so far away at the time. 
Chris couldn’t make it to celebrate for your thirtieth birthday but you did get a card from him where he joked that the wedding was off. You were in a long term relationship, one that Chris thought would lead to marriage but you ended things a year later. It wasn’t there; that natural spark that made your heart skip a beat every time they smiled brighter than the sun, or when their eyes sparkled like stars in the night every time they looked at you. 
You walked through the streets with Chris after dinner, casually strolling back towards your apartment and stretching out the inevitable goodbye that you didn’t want to say. It was so good to be with him in person again, not realizing how badly you missed it until the hours started ticking closer towards him leaving. By the time you get to your apartment Chris decided to come up stairs, wanting to spend as much of his time with you as he could. 
Chris sits comfortably on your couch, cozied up beside a large pillow. He places his wine glass down on your coffee table, needing to gesticulate with both hands as he starts getting into talking about his research. He’s been published before in numerous academic journals and now he’s going on about how excited he is for his latest topic, musculoskeletal alterations and the effects of deep space travel. 
He’s cute when he really gets into it, crinkles pulling around the corner of his eyes as his whole face lights up. You let out a shaky breath, smiling even wider yourself as you watched the passion he had for science and learning, one that matched the level you had for art and preserving their history. 
Chris apologized for rambling on, taking a sip of wine to clear the dryness from his throat. 
“So, give me the lowdown… can you jerk off in space?” 
He covered his mouth to prevent the wine he was choking on from spitting out. You couldn’t help the sly smile on your face that cracked wider the redder he became. 
“Well?”
Chris cleared his throat again. Pinching the bridge of his nose he looked down into his glass, chuckling a bit as he said, “The official stance from NASA is no comment so I’m going to stick with that.” 
“That’s not an answer!” You could barely hold a faux sneer before you broke into a smile. Teasing Chris was all in good fun, something that went both ways from the time you were young. 
You adjusted the way your legs were folded underneath you, brushing your knee against his leg. Chris lifted his arm up, a silent invitation for you to get closer and so you did, resting your head against him as his arm came around you.
Things had quieted down and you listened to the steady beat of his heart. This would be the last time you would see Chris for a long time. Your arm reached around to hold him for as long as you could.
“I’m going to miss you,” you whispered against him. 
Chris’ chest sunk as he exhaled a deep sigh. “I’m going to miss you too.” His arm squeezed a little tighter around you as he pressed his lips gently against your forehead. “Just look to the stars and I’ll be there.” 
His words brought a comforting smile to your face, one you shared with him as you tilted your head to look up at him. “Do you want to stay?”
The corner of his mouth tugs a little as Chris thinks about it. There’s nothing he really misses at his hotel more than he does you. The only reason he came to New York was to see you first before going home. 
“Yeah, I’d love to stay.”
You shifted yourself on top to straddle Chris, carding your fingers through his hair and taking in the gaze of his eyes that became pools of deep blue. You closed the distance between your lips, feeling his hands come around your back. Soft moans bubbled in your throat and soon you found yourself being carried to the bedroom. 
Clothes were discarded, lips were on skin that burned hotter than the stars. You writhe against him, thighs quivering around his head, reaching out to grip him by the hair, holding Chris in place as he coaxed out your release. His lips taste like you and he licks them again, savoring your sweetness as he crawls up your body. 
He tears open the condom, gathering your wetness on him as he slowly pushed in. A sinful moan falls from your lips as you feel the stretch of him inside you, inch by inch until he was fully seated. An experimental roll of his hips sets the pace for pleasure. 
Your hands graze up the curve of his arms, reaching his back and digging in half moon shapes into his skin with your nails as he thrusts into you.
“Ahh fuck, you feel so fucking good,” he panted, moaning as his hips snapped forward. His name fell from your lips, a sweet sound that he couldn’t deny he loved hearing. 
He changed his angle, hitting you with deeper, longer strokes. His mouth found your nipple, sucking at your peak as his hips gained speed; groaning and squeezing his eyes tightly as he fucked you, ready to explode.
“Shit!” Chris hissed, backing off quickly. You’re confused and concerned, sitting up and turning the light on beside your bed to see what was wrong. “The condom broke,” he said, still catching his breath.
Chris got up to discard it in the bathroom as you sat on the bed, crossing an arm over your chest, waiting nervously. When Chris walked back in the room he apologized for that, the stiffness of his length giving you relief that he hadn’t finished so you continued. Using your hands on him as he let out soft moans, distractedly opening another condom that you rolled down on him. You straddled him, leaning forward to capture his lips for a sweet kiss first before you lined yourself up and sank down on him. 
Soon enough you were riding waves of bliss together, gripping Chris as you clenched around him, burning white hot behind your eyes. He’s right behind you, on the edge of pleasure, exploding inside you like a supernova.
Dropping your head onto his chest, it felt like your body was made of overcooked noodles that splayed loosely against him as you were desperate to catch your breath, coming down from the heights you soared to. Chris’ arms hold you close against him, his lips languidly peppering kisses to your sheen covered skin. 
When his heartbeat returned to a steady pace Chris went to the bathroom to once again discard the condom and you followed behind him to use it. He went to the kitchen to get something to drink, bringing back an ice cold glass of water for you. 
Back in bed you cuddled together, with goosebumps breaking out on your skin as Chris’ fingertips graze gently up and down your arm. Your eyes feel heavy but you don’t want to give in because when you wake up you know you’ll have to say goodbye and that’s not something you want to do. 
“You’ll stay in touch, right?” you murmured against him, as worry took root within your stomach. His quick and emphatic reply should have been enough but you couldn’t help yourself from needing to make sure you would still hear from him during the mission. “And call me? With the space Skype?”
“I promise,” he said, as a smile spread across his face. Chris’ hand stopped moving, settling on your arm and holding you close. 
“Promise me one more thing?” He hummed in response and you continued, “Stay safe up there.”
Chris tilted his head down and feeling him shift you looked up as he said, “I promise.”
In the moonlight his eyes sparkled like clear tropical waters. Slowly, a soft smile spread across your face as you stared at him. “I love you, Chris.” There was no romanticism behind it even after being together, just pure love for your friend. 
Chris exhaled, planting a kiss to your temple. “I love you too, Y/N.” 
Despite wanting to spend your remaining hours together awake you reluctantly fell asleep in his arms, tearfully parting in the morning. Two weeks later you watched as the space shuttle launched, with proud tears filling your eyes as Chris’ picture flashed on your screen along with the rest of the crew. Seeing that made you feel hopeful and overjoyed at the prospect of hearing from him soon.
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“Chris… I’m pregnant.” It was a relief to finally tell him but you didn’t feel any better, uncertainty weighed heavy on your shoulders, crushing the space for your lungs to expand. Chris knows but now what?
He’s silent, his lips parted slightly and you don’t know if there’s a delay in the feed. Maybe you should have emailed it to him. You were going to at first and instead chose to word the importance of needing to speak to him in such a clandestine way that you were contacted by someone from NASA. Upon speaking to them they allowed your email to be dispatched and then you waited. 
Chris’ eyebrows knit together, his shoulders slumping down as he stared at your face through the screen. He didn’t have any doubts, you were always truthful with each other, but he still wondered how.
“We put on a new one, I thought…” 
“I thought we were good too,” you said, letting out a shaky breath. 
You weren’t just pregnant, you were pregnant with his child and based off of some quick calculations in his head you were nearing the end of your first trimester. “H-how are you? I mean, how are you feeling?”
“Physically or…” Nervous laughter bubbles out of your throat. 
This was hard on you, the physical symptoms weren’t fun but you could manage. What was more difficult was not telling anyone. It was early enough in your pregnancy that you could hide it from your family. They still lived in Hartford and hadn’t been down to visit yet but you couldn’t avoid them forever. Work was a different story. You had to let your boss know you would have to modify your duties as working around solvents and other chemicals would not be safe.
There was never a doubt in your mind about keeping the baby. When you were younger you imagined having children by now but it didn’t work out that way. It was something you were okay with, finding life fulfilling in different ways. Work was incredible, you were able to travel and though your relationships hadn’t worked out in the past you didn’t hold on to any resentments. Life was always complete and now things were going to be different. 
You wanted to speak to Chris first before telling your family because you needed to know your expectations. Chris had a life of his own and you didn’t want your choice of having a baby to make him feel obligated in any way. You were an adult; a smart, independent woman and could do this on your own.
“I know this isn’t something we planned but…” Chris exhaled, the corners of his mouth lifting upward, “There’s no one I’d rather do this with than you... I promise.” 
Chris’ eyes glisten with tears as his smile grows and you find yourself brushing away your own from the corner of your eyes. It was comforting to know Chris will be part of the baby’s life. Truthfully it would have been weird if he wasn’t in some capacity considering how close you were. For now you have a lot of time on how you’re going to figure things out for the future.
After the call Chris reflected in silence, staring out of the giant triangular windows of one of the Hermes’ common areas into the vastness of space. He was lost in thought, startled by his name being called by a crewmate. He turned to see Mark whose bright smile fell with concern upon seeing Chris’ face, asking if he was alright.
“I’m gonna be a dad,” Chris responded, his tone mournful in the realization he’ll be missing the birth. He accepted the congratulatory hug Mark gave him, sighing heavily as they separated. “I always thought I’d be there for that.” 
You were due in March and Chris hated the fact that he won't be there for the first nine months of his child’s life, moments and milestones he’ll never get back. He doesn’t like leaving this all on you. He knows you can do it but you shouldn’t have to. 
“I can’t pretend this isn’t hard but don’t think of it in terms of what you’re missing, look at what you’re gaining, what you have to look forward to when you come home.” Chris nodded, his smile trying to come back. “I didn’t even know you had a girlfriend,” Mark teased. 
“I don’t. Y/N, she’s…” Chris’ face lights up as he thinks about you, which does not go unnoticed by Mark. “We’ve been friends since we were kids. She’s always meant so much to me and now…” 
Mark gave Chris an honest smile as he spoke plainly, “And now you’re having a baby.” 
With a proud smile that stretched from ear to ear he affirmed, “Yeah… we are.” 
PART 2
522 notes · View notes
lovely-ateez · 4 years ago
Text
Favorite Place~
ꕥPosted: 3/8/21
ꕥGenre: College!au, Angst, Fluff
ꕥPairing: FemReader! x Emo!Hongjoong
ꕥWord Count: ~4.8k
ꕥWarnings: General angst (happy ending), Unknown man being creepy to reader, Characters insulting reader behind her back, Alcohol intake, Driving with a few sips of alcohol (please don’t drink and drive), Implied violence, Language, Oral (f recieving), Unprotected sex, Corruption kink, Language
ꕥA/N: Reader is a girly-girl bc we need more rep that isn’t hella negative and to actually be portrayed as smart and hardworking for once 😤 You👏can👏be👏both👏 ANyWay—thank you for bearing with me while I wrote this
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I ran my hands along the open science textbook laying upon my desk, eyes scanning rapidly over the information. The pages were thin and flimsy, clearly showing the book’s age. If I wasn’t careful, the pages would rip with ease. Not that I had time to actually think about that.
In less than five minutes I, along with the twenty five other poor souls who took this class of their own volition, would be handed our last final for the class. A hundred and ten questions in an hour and thirty minutes.
The class was basically academic suicide and had I been told that, I would have stayed far, far away from the class. But no. No one bothered to run that by me.
A whiff of familiar cologne filled my nose and against my better judgement I looked up to find the class genius, Hongjoong Kim. It was bad enough that he was smart as a whip and never needed to study, but on top of it all he was a dangerous, handsome, irresistible bad boy.
He gave me a wink, a sly smile resting on his lips. I gave him the same reaction I always did: a blank face. There had been multiple times he had tried to rile me up, whether that be say something flirty or wink, or “accidentally” touch my shoulder, and I refused to give him the satisfaction of any reaction. I would keep a blank face, hoping that he would leave me alone.
I wasn’t immune to his charms. I felt butterflies in my stomach every time he looked at me just like any other girl he tried it on, but I didn’t want him to know that. The biggest reaction I had given him was an eyebrow quirk at most.
I could tell it bothered him. I knew he was frustrated that he couldn’t get me to blush or stutter my words, and that may have been part of why he kept up his antics. Probably the entire reason, knowing him. Had he not been a fuckboy, I might have fallen for him. Might have.
I returned my eyes to my book and heard his footsteps walk past me, headed to the very back of class. His usual spot.
“Alright ladies and gentlemen,” A loud clap could be heard from the front of the room, our professor signalling the start of class, “It is time for your final. I hope you all are well prepared. I ask that you remove anything from your desk aside from a pencil and I will begin to hand out the tests. You may leave as you finish, just make sure to hand me your tests before you leave. Good luck.”
Book already off my desk, I gripped my pencil, hoping six hours of studying was enough.
“Thank you.” I muttered to my professor as he placed the stack of papers on my desk.
Here goes nothing, I suppose.
-
I handed in my test with a smile, hoping that I’d pass. Taking a deep breath I stepped out of the classroom, seeing a familiar face. At the noise of my footsteps Hongjoong looked up from his phone with a devilish smile, eyes staring me down. I must’ve not noticed he turned in his test before mine, not that I was surprised. He always finished his test the quickest out of all of us.
“How’s it going, pretty-in-pink?”
Pink was my favorite color and and I wore pink clothes often, unfortunately it had earned me several unwanted nicknames, all coming from Hongjoong.
I barely bothered him a glace, “I have a name.” 
“But your nicknames are so unique to you. Don’t you love them?”
“Can’t say I do.” I walked away, not interested in entertaining him any longer than I already had.
“Farewell, princess.” He fleeted me with a honey-like voice.
Suppressing an eye roll, I gripped the straps of my backpack, ecstatic to get away from him. The more time I spent away from him the better. The less time I was with him meant there was less of a chance for me to get attached to him. I refused to let that happen.
After I left the building I grabbed a coffee and walked to the library, bracing the cold weather. I only had one final left and I needed to make sure I studied enough. Just one last push before I was done for the semester. Taking the elevator up to the third floor, I saw a familiar face who smiled at me and I sat down at his table.
“Hey! How do you think you did on the final?” Lia asked me as I took my laptop out.
“Honestly I don’t know. I don’t want to say I passed because knowing my luck, if I do I’ll fail it. I knew the majority of the answers though, so there’s that.”
“That’s a positive.” She cocked her head, observing the way my eyes were glued to my laptop, “So what are you studying for now?”
“Criminal Psychology. I don’t take it until late tomorrow but I wanna get some studying in.”
“You’ve been studying for hours, you’ll be fine. Let’s just go shopping instead.”
My ears perked and I slowly raised my head, “Damn you. You know I’m not gonna turn you down.”
A wide smile formed on her face as she placed her hands behind her head, “What are friends for?”
“Oh don’t look so cocky.”
“Why not? I’m pretty sure I’ve won here. Now let’s get going.”
Lia stood up and slid on her backpack, a smile still plastered on her face. Just as I was placing my laptop in my own backpack I heard a string of male voices and a mention of my name.
I gave Lia a look and, curiosity taking over, I snuck closer to the direction of the voices to see a group of men at a table hid behind a large stack of bookshelves. There were four of them, not a one of them sitting properly in a chair. Two were sitting on top of the table, another with his legs propped on the table, the other sitting upon a backpack which itself was on a chair. I could only see two of their faces and didn’t recognize either.
“We’ve gotta invite the token good girl, right?” A tall man with dark hair smiled, leaning back on the table.
A man with distinct dimples, clad in all black scoffed, “Y/n? Like she’d go to a party anyway.”
“She might.” Hongjoong tiled his head, allowing me to see him, black earrings swaying as he looked at the man with dimples.
Oh. He’s there, too.
“She dresses like she still believes in the tooth fairy.” A man with a blonde ponytail scoffed, “You think she’s gonna come to a party with people like us?”
I grabbed Lia’s arm to prevent her from storming over. She was upset, I was too, but I wanted to keep listening. Still, I couldn’t deny the pang of hurt I felt as I looked down at my pink skirt and cropped top. Was it a crime to like the color pink?
And I thought I looked cute today...
“You should be the last person to judge someone over the way the dress, Yeosang. You never wear anything but black. If she likes it, then she likes it. Fuck you.” Hongjoong bit back.
I felt tears welling up in my eyes. I didn’t know why he defended me, maybe he was just defending fashion for fashion’s sake and it had nothing to do with me, but it was still nice of him.
Yeosang smiled, “Damn someone’s aggressive, huh? Someone might almost think you’ve got feelings for the girl.”
Hongjoong remained silent.
“Ooh is she still not reacting to your desperate attempts to woo her?”
Hongjoong quickly became defensive, “Listen, I’m not-”
“Okay we’re not getting into this. Just invite her, you never know what she’ll say.” The dark-haired man said to Hongjoong, “And invite her friend, too. She wouldn’t go alone.”
“Yeah that’s a fair point. I’ll talk to them next time I see them.”
I turned to face Lia, whispering in her ear, “Let’s go. Please.”
Her face told me that she would much rather confront them, but changed as my eyes began to water once more. She nodded and put an arm around me, leading me out of the library.
A tear fell down my cheek as we walked. I raised my hand to wipe my face when Lia did it for me. She pulled me into a tight hug, running her hands through my hair.
“Don’t you think for a second that you’re any less of amazing. Fuck them for not seeing it.”
As she spoke more tears began to fall and my breath hitched, “But-t they-”
“No. There’s no excuse for being shitty to you, especially when you haven’t done anything to wrong them.”
I nodded, trying my best to believe her and steady my breathing.
“What can I do for you? What can I do to help?”
Releasing Lia from my tight grip I stepped back and looked in her eyes, “Nothing. Let’s just go shopping.”
My friend nodded and slipped her hand into my own, something she would always do when I needed comfort. I squeezed her warm hand, following her footsteps as she led me to her car.
“So...you’re not gonna go to the party are you?”
“Yeah I don’t think so.”
She let out a hum in approval and nodded, opening the car door for me.
As much as I wanted to take my mind off of the boys’ words, I couldn’t. No amount of retail therapy seemed to help that. I knew Lia was doing her best to make me feel better and I felt a bit guilty for bringing down the mood. She scoffed when I told her, making eye contact and emphasizing that she simply wanted to make me feel better.
Sooner than I liked, we had to part. Lia had a class in thirty minutes and I had to help out in an on-campus activity. She gave me a tight hug and a small smile, bidding me adue.
I was the Vice President of our Activities Planning Board and as such was in charge of setting up an Academic Bowl for the competing students. Unfortunately, I was having trouble setting up the large tables and my small frame just made it harder. I was confident anyone around could see that I was struggling and I huffed, hoping no one would look my way. It didn’t help that I was outside in the middle of campus, where anyone just walking by could see me.
“Do you need any help?”
I turned to find Hongjoong with his dark backpack slung over his shoulder, a concerned look on his face. Had I not desperately needed help, I would have refused.
“Yeah I do. Hold this, will you?” I nodded at the opposite side of the table I was struggling to hold.
He appeared shocked that I accepted his offer, but I didn’t dwell on it and instead lifted the table. We worked in silence aside from a few words of instruction I gave him, and I was thankful for the lack of distraction. When we set up the last table I placed my hands on my hips, looking at the tables.
Hongjoong crossed his arms, “Why were you doing this alone?”
“No one else signed up to help for the Academic Bowl, so I did it myself.” He gave a confused look so I clarified my position.
“Of course you’re the Vice President.” Hongjoong muttered.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” I faced him, feeling slightly offended.
He shrugged, “I know you’re just involved in a lot. I’m not surprised.”
Ignoring his comment, I took the conversation another direction. “Why did you help me?”
“You needed help, princess.” He answered simply.
I nodded, ignoring the nickname. “Well...thanks.”
A moment of silence followed until Hongjoong broke it, “Hey listen, there’s a party this weekend I want you to go.”
“Why?” I cocked my head.
“Why not?”
“Because I don’t know anyone that will be there.”
“You know me.”
“That’s not exactly an incentive.”
He scoffed in mock offense, “Okay first of all, ouch. Second, what if I sweeten the deal?”
My eyebrows raised, lips forming a smile, “Oh yeah? What could that possibly be?”
He faltered for a moment, his voice lowering seemingly without intent, “That’s the first time I’ve seen you smile. You’re beautiful.”
I turned from him, trying to will any semblance of a flustered expression off my face. “You were saying before?”
Hongjoong chuckled, “I’ll drive. You can even invite your friend if you want.”
“Lia?”
“Yeah. If it makes you more comfortable.”
At first, I wanted to say no. At first, I wanted to continue my streak of refusing any advance he made on me. But looking at his kind eyes, completely devoid of any malintent, I felt my heart flutter. When my mind thought back to how he had defended me in the library I felt a warmth bubbling in my chest. I pretended to ponder for a moment, even though I already knew my answer.
“Okay but I don’t...I don’t think I should tell Lia.”
“Why’s that?”
“She kinda hates you.”
He looked taken aback, “Might I ask why?”
I sighed, crossing my arms, “Don’t worry about it. So where is this party?”
He filled me in on the details and I did my best to keep up my neutral façade. I wouldn’t admit it, but I was ecstatic to see him outside of campus, my will of staying away from him faltering by the minute.
-
I stood in front of my closet for what seemed like hours, desperately trying to find something that would match the occasion. I laughed a bit to myself as I looked at the section of black clothes I had. I went through a bit of an emo phase in middle school and I just couldn’t bring myself to get rid of any of them. I debated avoiding black clothes all together, but the words of Yeosang rang in my head and I bit the inside of my cheek.
Fine. I’ll change it up. But I’ll be damned if I give up on pink.
Taking a deep breath I slipped into a light pink leather skirt reaching mid-thigh with black fishnets. I put on a black leather jacket over my black see through shirt exposing my lacy bra underneath, my pink shoes on last.
I took several deep breaths and observed myself in the mirror. It was a change, definitely. I didn’t mind black, but I wouldn’t wear just black alone. I wanted it to be more feminine.
I heard a car horn outside my apartment much sooner than I expected. Bracing for Hongjoong’s reaction, I stepped outside. I was greeted with a smug smile, the man adorning it seeming as confident as a god until he observed my clothes, his eyebrows raising.
Hongjoong’s eyes scanned over me, taking in my abrupt fashion change, “I still wasn’t entirely certain you’d go. Much less looking like this.”
My lips quirked into half-smile, “Well I can’t show up looking like I normally do.”
“Why not?”
My heart swelled at the genuine confusion evident on his face. “Some people don’t care for the way I dress.” I took a breath and continued, “I heard you and your friends in the library.”
I forced myself to look him in the eyes. I could see the gears turning in his head as he put the pieces together, a scowl forming on his face. “You don’t have to change a goddamn thing. You look great, don’t get me wrong, but you look great in pink, too. And I’m sorry if he made you feel otherwise.”
I shook my head. “It’s alright, I actually kinda like it.”
“You definitely make it work.” He swallowed, voice lowering.
“Then maybe I should wear a bit of black more often.”
The man gave a thousand dollar smile, quirking a brow that left my panties feeling slightly damp. He motioned to the car door, “Hop in, cutie.”
A friendly string of conversation followed us as Hongjoong drove. I felt my nerves starting to dissipate, his smile I once despised now bringing me comfort. And really, he was much funnier than I had believed. I found myself laughing with him more than I had in a long time. I knew my walls were falling, but I wasn’t trying to fight it anymore.
Why the hell not? He’s kind enough, and he isn’t even close to being hard on the eyes.
The car drive was much quicker than I expected, although how quickly I was unfamiliar with my surroundings through me for a loop. The trees around us became more sporadic and the sun set quicker than what seemed normal. I fidgeted slightly, prompting Hongjoong to look over at me. He intertwined my fingers with his own and I smiled, secretly welcoming his touch.
“Hey, don’t worry. I’m right here with you, okay?”
I nodded, grasping onto his hand tightly. Before I knew it, my eyes locked with the building in front of us. I took in the abandoned building in front of me, eyes widening slightly as I observed its poor condition. Large windows were shattered, vines were growing around pillars, grass peaking through what once was concrete.
“This is the most sketchy place I’ve ever seen in my life.” I spoke, feeling slightly alarmed by the building but comforted by Hongjoong’s presence.
“Oh come on, it’s not that bad.”
“I literally just saw a rat run out a broken window.”
Hongjoong suppressed a smile and let go of my hand, opening his car door and telling me to stay in place as he walked around and opened the door on my side. I hesitated as I exited the car, a bit afraid of what could possibly be inside the building.
“We can leave at anytime. If you don’t want to go in we can leave right now. I don’t want you to be uncomfortable.”
As sweet as he was being, I felt the need to prove to him that I was brave enough to enter, even if it did look like he was leading me to my death.
“Thank you, but I’m okay. We can go in.”
He smiled, leading me to an out-of-the-way entrance which seemed to lead to a different building entirely. I gave an involuntary “woah” as we entered the building. As horrific as it looked on the outside, it was gorgeous on the inside. Perfectly up kept brick walls hugged the sides of the building, lights were strung from the ceiling, arcade machines and dart boards were huddled in a corner, and of course, there was a bar with a seemingly unlimited amount of liquor. People were scattered all throughout, socializing and being generally loud. Everyone wore about the same color clothes as Hongjoong, dark as they could possibly get.
“How did you even find this place?”
“My friend Yeosang and I were just driving around and we found it one day. Decided to make it our hangout spot.”
I looked at him confused, still amazed at my surroundings. Hongjoong led me over to his familiar group of friends, assuring me that they wouldn’t bite, and introduced me to the seven men, four of which I hadn’t seen prior. I saw the color drain from a few of their faces as they saw me, likely from their words in the library, but I didn’t comment on it. Overall, they were much friendlier than I expected them to be.
“I’m gonna get a drink,” Hongjoong nudged me, “You want anything?”
“No that’s okay. I think I’m gonna check out the pinball machines. They look kinda cool.”
“You sure you don’t wanna stay by my side? I won’t take long.”
I shook my head, “I’ll be okay.”
He chucked, “Alright. I’ll grab a drink and I’ll head right over, princess.”
I bit my lip at the nickname and wandered over to the machines, surprisingly feeling comfortable in the environment, despite everything being so unfamiliar. All of the games were being used, some people clearly playing better than others.
I got lost in the artwork on the side of a particular pinball machine when a gruff voice caught my attention. “What’s a pretty thing like you doing here?”
I turned to meet a tall man with grey hair. He was young, likely in his mid-twenties, and reeked of cigarettes and a foul smell I couldn’t place.
A flash of fear ran through me and I tried to make my voice as confident as possible, “I was invited.”
“Well...that’s certainly a shame now, isn’t it? I wasn’t invited, but I decided to show up for a bit of fun anyway.”
He came closer to me, our height difference incredibly prominent as he leaned over me, “How about you give me a kiss, little thing?” I ran away as soon as the words left his mouth, hoping that he wouldn’t follow me but assuming he would. I dashed around quickly and sporadically around people, hoping I would lose him.
I looked around desperately for Hongjoong, sighing when I found him surrounded by his friends, laughing at something one of them said. I ran up to him and grabbed his arm, gaining his attention.
I hope this fucking works.
“I need you to kiss me.”
A look of confusion flashed in his eyes, “What?”
“Please kiss me.” I begged, eyes wide, disregarding the stares of his friends around us, hoping that if the man saw I was taken he’d leave me alone.
Without hesitation he wrapped his free hand around my waist—a cup of alcohol still in the other—and pulled me close, pressing his lips to my own. He kissed me hard, biting my bottom lip slightly and letting out a growl only I could hear. He wasn’t my first kiss, far from it, but no one had ever kissed me like he did. Just a kiss had never left me feeling weak at the knees. Just a kiss had ever made me feel so submissive, making me want to beg him to take me right on the spot, regardless of the fear in my veins. Even with the taste of alcohol still on his lips, his scent overtook me.
He pulled back, eyes darker than before, and raised a brow, “Care to tell me what that was about?”
Just then I realized my hands had been gripping his leather coat, pulling him just as close as he was pulling me. I looked over in the direction of where the man was before, not seeing him.
“A man was following me and he was trying to get me to kiss him a-and I didn’t know him...I just wanted him to leave me alone.”
His eyes narrowed at my words, a rage I hadn’t seen before taking over them, “What did he look like?”
“I-I don’t know he was tall and had grey hair and-”
He cursed under his breath. Keeping me just as close he turned to the men around him, their eyes narrowed as well.
“You heard that?” He asked his friends.
“Loud and clear.” San said, cracking his knuckles, a scowl on his face that scared me, even though I knew I wasn’t the one it was directed at.
“I thought we told him to never come back here.” Jongho snarled.
“We did.” Hongjoong said.
Seonghwa looked at me, nodding to Hongjoong, “Keep her safe and take her out of here. If he’s here I’m sure he’s brought friends. Yeosang, lead everyone out. We’ll take care of him.”
Hongjoong looked conflicted, obviously wanting to stay and fight, but gave into the older man’s command. “Be fucking safe,” he barked, but I could see the fear in his eyes as he looked at me, “Come on, we’re going.”
Seonghwa mumbled something to Hongjoong and he nodded in response, tossing his alcohol to the ground. I didn’t have time to ask questions as he led me out a back door, the darkness of the night equally horrifying and comforting, and quickly pushed me into his car, apologizing the entire time. He entered the key into the ignition and the car sprung to life.
“Uhh...maybe it’s not a good idea for you to drive. You’ve been drinking, right?”
“I had maybe two sips. I’ll drive safe, promise.”He gave me a small comforting smile, “Put your seatbelt on. Hold on tight, sweetheart.” His voice was calm but firm as he spoke. I nodded and did as he said, bracing as his car sped off, my heart beating in overtime.
The ride was a blur, the only things I could remember being Hongjoong’s calming voice, periodically reassuring me that things would be okay. We arrived at a foreign building which Hongjoong called his house, and only then did I let myself fall apart. I felt tears streaming down my face as my hands quivered, my head beginning to pound.
“Hey, hey look at me. You’re safe. You’re safe with me.” My teary eyes met his and I felt my heart break at the way he was looking at me, as if he had made me cry himself.
“Here, come on. Let’s get you inside, okay?”
My tears slowed as he carefully led me inside his house, sitting me down on his bed. He crouched down in front of me, wiping the tears from my face.
“I’m so sorry, princess. I didn’t realize he was going to be there. I never should’ve made you come along I’m so-”
“Who was that?”
Hongjoong sighed, “He used to be a friend of mine. We had a falling out and he became violent. One time he showed up at one of our parties with some friends of his to start a fight. We won and told him to never come back. Looks like he did.” He looked off into nowhere, regret clear on his face.
“You didn’t know,” I sniffled, “You couldn’t have known.”
I watched the muscles in his jaw tighten, his agitation still visible. I brought a hand out to reach his own, trying to comfort him. The loud ding of Hongjoong’s phone made me jump and he apologized profusely. As he took out his phone from his pants pocket I looked around his room for the first time. It looked exactly as I had expected, solid black furniture and so many band posters decorating the wall I could hardly tell what color his bedroom walls were.
Hongjoong spoke up, “I just got a text from Seonghwa. There were two other people there with him. My friends took care of them don’t worry, you’re safe.”
I nodded, pulling him into a hug and burying my face into his chest. “If you’re comfortable with it,” He started, “I’d like you to stay here. I want to know you’re safe.”
My eyes met his as he moved a hair out of my face, “I’m not pressuring you. If you don’t want to I understand.”
A hand of his ran up and down my back, tracing little patterns here and there, and I realized just how much I wanted to be with him.
“If it’s alright with you, I’d like to stay.”
He laughed, “What do you mean ‘if it’s alright with you’ I asked.”
I bit my bottom lip and looked down, a bit embarrassed.
Hongjoong laughed, “Hey, look at me.” He said in a commanding yet sweet tone that made my thighs press together. I glanced back up at him, his handsome features making me feel dizzy.
He chuckled, “What’s that look for? You got something to say to me?”
I hesitated, “Actually, I do have a question.”
“Which is?”
“Why did you chase after me?”
Hongjoong smiled, “You never gave a reaction to anything I tried. It confused me and piqued my curiosity. So I began to watch you and how you interacted with people. You’re gentle and sweet. You’re innocent and haven’t let the world tear you down. I admire that.”
He leaned closer to me, his lips brushing my ear, “And it turned me on beyond belief. I wondered how I could ruin you, thought about how I could turn you into a quivering mess as you beg for me.”
I shivered and pulled back slightly to look him in the eyes. His beautiful, dark eyes. Hongjoong let out a dark chuckle as he sat on his bed, lifting me on his lap. He gave an eyebrow raise and a crooked smile as my breath hitched while looking at him, taking him in.
How did I never notice how his dark hair falls to one side when he cocks his head and how he looks so endearing when it happens? How did I never pay attention to his soft pink lips that give way to his gorgeous smile and how much I’ve been dying to kiss them all this time? How did I not see the way his eyes form crescents when he smiles, making my heart grow ten times over?
Why did I never think to take note of how his deep voice makes my stomach do somersaults? Why was I so unaware of his tongue piercing that was leaving me wonder how it would feel on my skin? Why didn’t I observe the black painted nails of his that were currently dancing along my thighs, giving me goosebumps?
How and why did I never notice him?
“You’re such a good girl.”
And for the first time around him, I flushed.
He chuckled, “Oh? You like that?”
I nodded quickly and he said it again, smiling as my face heated up once more.
“It’s so good to see you react to what I say. I wonder...” Hongjoong leaned closer to me, “How will you react when you’re underneath me? Squirming and begging for me to touch you?”
I gave him a look of desperation and balled his shirt into my fist, trying to move him closer, “Please.”
Hongjoong lifted me off of him, quickly discarding my clothes followed by his own shirt. My eyes were guided down by his abs and I ran a hand across them without thinking, whimpering quietly.
“Is my baby girl getting needy?” He cooed.
I closed my eyes, once again nodding in embarrassment.
“How about we take care of that?”
He laid me down on the soft sheets of his bed, leaving me in anticipation as he pinned my hands above my head with a hand of his own. My eyes widened and he chuckled, running a single finger along my folds.
“You’re so unbelievably fucking wet...do I turn you on that much?”
I let out a small “yes” and he hummed in response. Placing a few kisses upon my lips, Hongjoong slowly entered two fingers into me and my back arched. His fingers curled, hitting a spot inside of me that’d I’d never been able to reach. I spread my legs as far as they could go, pleading for more, feeling tears prick my eyes.
Hongjoong spoke, his voice already dropping several octaves, “Keep your hands here, understand? I don’t want you moving them.”
I nodded, willing my hands to stay in place as his own moved to my hips, leaving kisses along my inner thighs.
“Hongjoong please.”
“Please what, princess?”
“Please touch me.”
“Oh, I think I can do better than that, don’t you?”
His lips attached to my core, tongue running through my folds and nose hitting my clit as I moaned pathetically. His hands held my hips down as I tried to buck them up, barely able to keep my hands above my head. After what felt like years, his mouth finally reached my clit and I cried out as his lips attached to it, sucking hard and leaving kitten licks. My high built up quickly and I came hard, my hands leaving their spot and pulling slightly on his hair.
“Thought I told you to keep your hands above your head, no?”
I mumbled an apology and he leaned over to kiss me, “You’re forgiven, darling.”
He seemed just as impatient as I was and without much begging the rest of his clothes were off, his dick teasing my entrance.
“God Hongjoong please I need you so bad.”
“I need you too, y/n.”
He fully entered me, cursing as he did so. I was so caught up in the feeling of him inside of me that I didn’t even register him asking me a question until he laughed at me.
“Feeling good, baby? Can’t even speak?”
I whimpered, nodding seeming to be the only thing I could manage to do. I felt his member twitch inside of me and I pleaded for him to fuck me, to give me anything. Hongjoong growled and jerked his hips up into me over and over, leaving me a moaning mess.
“Taking me so well, aren’t you? Such a good girl for me.”
The amount of praise he gave me caused a few tears to fall from my eyes, not realizing how bad I needed it until that moment. My walls clenched around him every time, causing him to groan and snap his hips into me even harder. Hongjoong’s eyes grew hazy, his dark hair sticking to his forehead.
“I’m close, darling. Be my good girl and cum for me”
His hand trailed down to my clit, rubbing tiny circles. My back arched as I came in time with him, our breaths synchronizing as we gasped for air.
He slowly pulled out of me and ran to the bathroom to grab a towel, cleaning me up. Hongjoong giggled and I raised a brow at him.
“I never thought you’d give me a chance. It’s almost like I’ve corrupted you.”
“You have. Aren’t you aware of the party I went to because of you? I almost died.”
Hongjoong laughed as he crawled into bed and pulled blankets over the both of us. He ran a hand through my hair, looking at me fondly, “You did not almost die.”
“Okay yeah but I could have. That’s what we should be focusing on here.”
“I think there’s something else I’d like to focus on.”
Hongjoong pulled me into a deep kiss, hand slithering down to my waist. His kisses trailed to my ear, a slight chuckle leaving his lips, “My pretty princess.”
I looked at him with doe eyes, slightly in awe of him, and wondered how I could’ve pushed him away for so long. I knew for certain that I had no intention of doing so ever again.
When I told him he smiled, “Good. You’ve had a grip on my heart since day one. I’d be a fool to let you get away from me.”
I blushed slightly, much to his entertainment. We snuggled up to each other in silence, listening to the sound of our synchronized breathing as I lulled to sleep, our warm fingers intertwined. My dreams filled of him.
“Sleep well, my princess. I’ll be right here when you wake.”
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luxe-pauvre · 3 years ago
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Hello Holly....
I was wondering if you could have any suggestions for me about this - i have this exam that i so need to get a good rank and qualify so that i can do p.hd. But i think i am not working as hard as i should be. I see other exam aspirants and i lose my sh** because the level of questions they are trying to solve. I know i haven't been too studious in the past yet i studied as best as i could (i have adhd and grew up in a dysfunctional family and it took me a lot of time to unlearn and relearn a lot of stuff). I do try and study good and sometimes i drift so easily away. The thoughts i specifically label as "unnecessary" some how creep up and before i know I'd have spent hours with it. Sometimes i really think i remember my past or some people or create scenarios just to not keep studying. I really want to study. I really am interested. I just slip away into not studying so easily. Honestly those Students in the top,being eligible for various fellowship scare me and make me think that i am never gonna be one among them and i should give up and find something else to do. Sometimes i can't bear the thought of failing to score the cutoff mark again and seeing the disappointment on my parents face. I think that pressure is there and i don't know how to handle. Please.. Do you have any advice for me? Any insights? I could really use your help. I totally understand if you couldn't answer me.
Take care🌻. Love your posts always. It is so attractive to see how much you read.
Okay, there is a lot to unpack here so I am going to try and organise my answer as best as possible.
‘I think I am not working as hard as I should be.’ The key words in that sentence are ‘I think’. Thinking/feeling like you’re not studying as much as you should is not evidence that that is true. Studying is not about quantity, but quality. Getting in an hour a day of difficult active recall is better than spending ten hours highlighting and re-reading notes. Look into evidence-based study practices (I highly recommend the book Make It Stick: The Science of Successful Learning), and, given how dedicated you seem, work out a way to get comfortable with the feeling that you’re not doing enough. I, too, never feel like I’m doing enough. Earlier in the year I had to have some time off sick and felt so behind when I returned, despite there being no objective evidence that I was behind. I stuck a post-it note in my eye line on the wall above my desk that had ‘you are not behind’ written on it. It reached the point after a few days of constantly glancing at it that even having the thought that I was behind became ridiculous and laughable, and eventually I just got on with what I needed to do unhindered by the thought.
‘I see other exam aspirants and I lose my sh** because the level of questions they are trying to solve [...] those students in the top … scare me and make me think that I am never gonna be one among them and I should give up’ You have to run your own race. What other people are doing should have no bearing on what you are doing. You’re not seeing what is really going on for them, you’re seeing what they want you to see. During my MSc year I was surrounded by students who were pulling ten hour study days and seemingly had an impossible amount of extracurriculars going on, and appeared to have everything together, but they didn’t get in to the programs they wanted to. They were either putting in the hours, but not using them effectively, or were just unlucky. It’s horrible to acknowledge but there are far far more students capable of doing PhDs than there are places, so a certain amount of luck is involved. You can do everything right, you can be the gold star student with the top scores and the twenty extracurriculars and several summer’s of work experience, but still not get a place. Focus on what you can control, on what you are doing, and forget about everyone around you.
‘I studied as best I could’ Great. That’s all you can do and all you can expect from yourself. I don’t have ADHD nor do I have close friends/colleagues who do, and so I cannot offer you advice on this specifically. If you’re at a college/university with a student wellbeing/health/disability service do reach out to them for advice. My usual self-help resource that my university recommends has nothing ADHD-specific. If anyone reading this has any resources to help Anon, please share them in the notes.
‘Sometimes I can’t bear the thought of failing to score the cutoff mark again’ Failure is part of getting into a PhD program. There’s a student in my lab group who has just submitted her thesis, and I’ve read it, and it’s amazing, and she’s amazing, and her CV is amazing, and she’s going on to a fantastic post-doc position, and it all seems so glorious. But I was talking to her at her leaving party last week and discovered she didn’t get the first TWENTY TWO PhD programs/projects she applied for. It’s ridiculous that this the system we’re all desperately trying to work in, but you’ve got to get comfortable with failure. I highly recommend you look up academic CVs of failures that some professors publish to get a true grasp of the scale of failure the ‘superstars’ around you have faced. Persistence and perseverance and being comfortable with rejection are the most valuable skills you can carry into a PhD program, just keep going.
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The Sight of You (Spencer Reid x Reader)
Summary: Spencer’s disturbing dreams about his childhood bring him back to Las Vegas to face two of his childhood’s greatest enemies: his estranged father and his ex best friend.
AN: it’s a friends to enemies to lovers fic! Set in the episode “Memoriam” 4x07
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Content Warnings: usual Criminal Minds stuff, mentions of child death, childhood trauma, descriptions of a dead body. Let me know if I missed anything!
Despite seeing Spencer around Pre-k, Y/N did not trot over to talk to him with their brightly coloured rucksack swinging vigorously and violently behind them. They walked faster instead once their parents had dropped them off. Spencer did his best to catch up to Y/N but lost them around the corner in the sea of students seeking their next class. He was meant to be one of them. Adjusting his glasses as they slipped down his nose, Spencer noted that he needed a new prescription before entering his own class and preparing to focus on a subject he was already well-versed in.
It was lunch time when Spencer finally found Y/N. They were sitting at the furthest end of the table in the canteen. But Y/N cowered away from him, his shoulders drawn up defensively.
“Are you OK, Y/N?” Spencer asked before getting to what was more significant to him: “Do you know when you will be free to play again?”
The next sentence out of Y/N’s mouth stung like a nettle. They stood up, their face contorted in their fit, and they pushed Spencer hard on the shoulders.
“Go away! I can’t look at you! You make me feel sick, you and your family!” They cried.
They went silent when Spencer was laughed at by those who heard what was said. Just grabbed their lunch and moved away, leaving Spencer spellbound in the middle of the canteen, heartbroken and with a new opening for a potential chess partner. Maybe that man they saw last week at the park would be kind enough to join him again.
But there was no replacement for Y/N, who now never said a word when they caught a glimpse of Spencer being bullied – only dithering about on the spot before fleeing the scene moments before a teacher would show up.
Spencer was hurt; that hurt warped into hatred when he was next out with his mother and father. They were at the shopping mall and had just bought Spencer his new glasses. Going down the escalator, he saw Y/N. They were smiling and skipping between their parents, a new pair of shoes shiny on their feet.
The second they spotted the Reids, Y/N ducked behind their parents. Spencer could still see their face: brow furrowed, eyes squinting, hands shaking now that nothing was holding them. Their parents didn’t seem to notice. They kept talking and walking even as Y/N stopped in time with the Reids stepping off the escalator.
Sudden footsteps running away was what dragged the public’s attention to a suddenly absent child.
“Y/N!” The parents called out as they chased after the four-year-old. They were quick past the Reids, not stopping to say ‘hello’.
Spencer kept his eyes trained after Y/N’s fleeing form, right until his mother’s face came into view. Diana looked saddened; she too was staring after the L/Ns. Turned to his father. William was composed but his eyes were turned down and watering.
For making his parents react like that to their mere presence, Spencer despised Y/N.
---> ---> ---> ---> ---> 
 The burning hatred from adolescence staled once Spencer reached adulthood. The protective nature that spawned from it for his mother remained.
Which is why, when Diana Reid casually mentioned Y/N when asked about Riley Jenkins, Spencer froze up.
“You remember Y/N?” He said stiffly.
Diana didn’t notice her son’s change in tone, “Of course, you two were opposites but you got on so well. So sad what happened to them.”
The first guess was that she was referring Y/N’s repeated attempts at running away before Reid cut contact with neighbourhood gossip at age fourteen. He didn’t bother with a second attempt to understand what his mother meant.
“I don’t care about Y/N. I want to know if you remember Riley.”
“And I told you: Riley was a boy you made up.”
“No, Mom, he was a real boy who lived in our neighbourhood, and somebody killed him. And, I don't know, I think-- I think that dad might have had something to do with it.”
“He was real?”
“Yes. And...”
“He was on that little league team, too.”
 ---> ---> ---> ---> --->
The whole case was surreal - “case” being a very loose term.
When they got into his office, Spencer thought that perhaps things might simmer down a little. Unfortunately, as soon as his father spoke about their history of similarity in appearance, Spencer’s usual comfort of statistics and facts on the elderly and pets failed to conceal his abandonment issues.
William Reid was clearly affected by Spencer’s accusations, calling the idea of fitting the profile thus being Riley’s killer “absurd”. Furthermore, he was confrontational when asked for access to his files and demanded a warrant. Coupled with Lou Jenkins’ absolute certainty that William was not involved in Riley��s murder and Penelope asking him “you sure about this?” concerning invading the aforementioned files, Spencer was very close to snapping.
“I really wish people would stop asking me that.”
Then there was the envelope posted beneath his motel room door. Suspicious timing aside, there was a brand-new suspect basically handed over on a silver platter. One Gary Michaels whom Spencer couldn’t remember him but he couldn’t be sure that he didn’t know him. Uncertainty being the feeling he hated the most.
This man could fit the profile; his previous of exposing himself to a minor was a precursor to molestation. But that wasn’t what Spencer wanted to hear from the shady file slipped to direct his attention away from William.
Garcia reported back about his father’s drives, “No kiddie porn, no membership to illicit websites, no dubious emails, no chat room history.”
“What about his finances?”
Hotch joined the conversation, “We went back ten years. No questionable transactions that we can find.”
Spencer sighed while Emily decided to crack a joke: “Well, he did buy a ticket to see Celine Dion six months ago, but I think we can overlook that.”
“He’s smart. Is it possible he kept things under the table?” Spencer persisted.
“Well, of course,” Hotch answered, “But from what we can tell, Reid, he doesn’t fit the profile.”
“We can tell you other things about him, if you want to know.”
A peace offering on behalf of Emily. Clearly she had improved after her night out and subsequent hangover. Spencer gave the go-ahead and Emily listed her profile:
“He's a workaholic, he actually logs more hours than we do. He makes decent money, but he doesn't spend a lot of it. He has a modest house. He drives a hybrid. He doesn't travel much. He stays away from the casinos. Um, and according to his veterinary bills, he has a very sick cat.”
“He appears to spend most of his free time alone,” Hotch added, “He goes to the movies a lot, and he reads. And from his collection of first editions, it seems his favourite author is-”
Spencer interrupted his boss, “Isaac Asimov, I remember that one.” He pressed his lips together. They were right; William Reid did not fit the profile.
Garcia piped up once more, “He does have one other major interest. On his home computer, he's archived, like, a ka-jillion things on one common subject.”
“What?”
“You, kiddo. He's got, like, everything that's been published online. Every article you've been quoted in, pieces you've written for behavioural science journals, He even has a copy of your dissertation.”
“He's keeping tabs on you,” Rossi said, That's saying something.”
But Spencer smoothly dismissed this attempt to make excuses for his father, “Yeah, he googled me. That makes up for everything. I'm going to get some air.”
 ---> ---> ---> ---> --->
After getting said air, Spencer went to the local bar and began playing an computerised poker game. His paying attention was only to distract himself, clear his head with something he knew he could control. And thankfully, a chance interaction with a lady at the bar spawned the inspiration for a sporadic hypnosis session.
Doctor Jan Mohikian allowed them a session. Reminded of the limitations that a four-year old’s memory could provide, not including the bias he already had as a son and a profiler, Spencer lay on the couch. His feet hung over the end so that his head could be comfortable in a pillow. There was no time for self-consciousness with Rossi in the room observing. He closed his eyes and felt his hand be placed upon Doctor Mohikian’s body.
She spoke low and calmingly, “I want you to hold my wrist in your left hand. And if you should feel any fear, I want you to squeeze, do you understand?”
“Yes.”
“Go back to the night you were just telling me about. You're at home, in your room. You can't sleep because your parents are arguing.”
 ---> ---> ---> ---> --->
 His eyes were closed still, but the couch shifted into a bed. His bed. A floor below, the faint shouting between his mother and father was heard. There was someone else there too. A child wailing, and it wasn’t him.
Suddenly his father was at his side, touching his arm, saying, “I know you’re awake. Daddy loves you; you know that?”
Spencer didn’t want to be there, and then it was the following morning.
Putting his glasses, the room fell into focus. His mother was there, she didn’t see him because she was too busy looking out the window. Her body language told him that this was not a meltdown, but what she saw was distressing. She’d been crying. As she walked away into the house, she hid her face as if she knew Spencer was watching and she wanted to hide her reaction from him.
Spencer ran to the window the second Diana had left the room.
His father was in the back garden and burning clothes. A bloody shirt, a tiny cardigan, landed on top of the pile already set alight.
“5, 4, 3, 2, 1, and wake.”
 ---> ---> ---> ---> --->
 And Spencer was shocked out of the scene, back to the doctor’s couch and gripping her wrist with an iron grip. Rossi was by his side, bringing him back to peace with his voice.
 ---> ---> ---> ---> --->
 Derek was clearly disturbed that Spencer was very set on his father being a paedophilic murderer as much as he had been that Spencer was taking something that was said after his mother’s fit seriously. He continued however to assist with Rossi in Spencer’s investigation.
As if everything else hadn’t been hard enough, the captain took some time to agree to holding William Reid in custody. Finally, he settled for twenty-four hours. William was as resistant to the questions as he had been upon the initial reunion. All he could say was that he didn’t hurt Riley. Spencer wore him down, getting him to drop the Gary Michaels bomb plus the threat that he “didn’t want to go down that road”.
Garcia’s search of Gary Michaels’ DNA on the databases brought to light that their suspect was dead. Buried across state lines, beat over the head with a pipe or bat, and the body was discovered in 2001.
“Maybe it wasn’t Riley’s blood on the clothes he was burning.” Derek was about to hang up when Garcia began to speak again, a new discovery ready for her team.
“Also, Todd found something in your father’s finances. There was a standing order for a therapist, specifically a child therapist from 1985 to 1995. I thought it was for Spencer, but William left when you were twelve, and these sessions continue irregularly after he left you!”
“Who was the patient?”
“One Y/N L/N. Local to North Vegas, born 1980 to Shelly and Finley L/N.”
Both Rossi and Derek looked away from the phone to Spencer and he knew. He knew he’d have to face another villain from the past – like a knight in one of Y/N’s stories.
“Still alive?”
“Yep, already pulling up an address. There’s a lot of short leases attached to this name. Lucky for you, they keep going back to live with their parents.”
Spencer wasn’t entirely sure that he could handle two bitter reunions in one day.
“We’ll send off the fingerprint while we visit Y/N. They could have been a potential victim of Michaels before he died. They might know something.”
 ---> ---> ---> ---> --->
It was a normal home in a normal neighbourhood. Spencer had never visited Y/N’s house. Their play-dates were always at the park.
“Hello, Mr L/N,” held up their badges, “I’m Agent Derek Morgan, this is Agent David Rossi and Doctor Spencer Reid. May we come in and ask you some questions?”
“Sure. My wife is uh out at work at the moment,” Finley opened the door wider and stepped aside for the trio to enter, “I’m the house husband as it were.”
Looking about the kitchen, Spencer spied several photos of an adult Y/N but very few of them as a toddler and even less as a teenager.
“You have a child, Mr L/N?” Rossi asked.
“All grown up now, Y/N,” Finley smiled with a nod. Then he squinted at Spencer, “You’re not related to William Reid by chance, are you?”
Masking his bitterness, Spencer said shortly, “He’s my father.”
Finley seemed in awe at the prospect, so Derek redirected the conversation back to the matter at hand, “What was Y/N like as a child?”
Nodding still, like a bobble head, Finley looked weary at the notion, “Troubled. They were very young when they withdrew into themselves. Used to run away from home a lot. I don’t know what happened, but Y/N never told us.” He then jumped to protect his child’s reputation at present, “They’re doing better now, went to therapy and they’re doing very well for themselves.”
“I’m glad to hear.” Rossi replied.
Finley continued his defence of Y/N, “They’re a published author, they write fantasy things for kids and young adults. We’re very proud of them.”
“Did Y/N know Riley Jenkins when they were a child?”
“Riley Jenkins, that’s Lou’s kid who died, right?” Finley sought confirmation and, when he had it, he spoke, “Not personally. I think they might have played at the park once or twice. Before he died, Y/N would play with anyone. But you… you know that.” And Finley gestured to Spencer, much to his disgust.
“Is Y/N in the area?” Spencer asked briskly.
“Well, they’re due for a visit in a few hours. They went on holiday.”
“They still live with you?”
“A month ago, they got a new flat in the city. But they’ve got their own room here, for whenever they need it.”
“May we see it?”
The wallpaper was barely visible beneath exam revision notes, posters of Fresh sheets on the bed and the clear space on the floor were the only tidy things about the place. It was a haven of organised clutter.
A chess set caught Spencer’s eye. It sat upon the windowsill, recently dusted. The pieces were not that of a classic set; each was painted prettily but with enough error to indicate it was a personal touch.
“You and Y/N were close then?” Derek was holding up a photo album. Upon inspection, the photograph the page was open on was of Spencer and Y/N dressed up for Halloween as Doctor Frankenstein and the Monster respectively – accurate to the book of course.
“Yeah, ‘were’,” Spencer turned back to the chess set. He didn’t bother to ask when his friends had figured out he knew Y/N.
Rossi decided to further test the waters, “You think that Y/N could have killed Riley?”
“Of course not. A four-year-old couldn’t kidnap, tie up, rape, and kill a boy their own age. No violent history that indicates they would ever do something like this. Do I think that Y/N knows something about what happened and my father is trying to keep them quiet? Yes.”
Rossi moved beside Spencer, picking up the knight. Except it wasn’t a knight. It was a wizard of some kind in purple robes.
“We’ll stay up here for a bit then go down once Y/N’s inside and settled,” He gestured with the knight to the window. Spencer blanched as he spied a cab at the end of the driveway. The trunk was open and someone was retrieving a suitcase from within.
Y/N appeared around the corner, waving off the cab and turning to the house. Mr L/N appeared on the drive and they met in the middle for a hug. Over Mr L/N’s shoulder, Spencer could see that Y/N had grown into their chubby childhood features. They looked genuinely happy.
He would have to go through with it, but he didn’t have to like it. And he couldn’t go hide in the bathroom like with his father.
The trio plodded down the stairs when the sound of the front door closing was replaced with a joyous gathering in the kitchen. It all changed when Y/N went to take off their jacket and caught sight of the three FBI agents standing in the doorway. Taking out his badge, Rossi led the way.
“Hello, Y/N, I’m Agent David Rossi, this is Agent Derek Morgan, and Doctor Spencer Reid. We’re looking into the death of Riley Jenkins, and we were hoping to ask you some questions.”
To the naked eye, very little changed about Y/N’s appearance. To the three profilers, there was a visceral reaction: Y/N’s right hand started trembling, the hard swallow, the dropping of their gaze from Spencer to the floor.
“OK,” They said, a great deal quieter than they had been with their father.
Rossi sat next to Y/N at the dinner table. Derek was beside Rossi; Spencer stayed standing. Mr L/N stayed in the kitchen, at Y/N’s request.
“Can you tell us what you remember about Riley?” Rossi began.
“Not very much, I don’t really remember much about school.”
“Oh, you don’t?” Spencer blurted, “Well, I do.”
Derek glanced back at him with a look that just screamed “shut the hell up”. It seemed to cut down Y/N’s resolve, their jaw quivering.
“Sorry, can you give me a moment?” They stood up quick, the chair legs scraping loudly against the floor as they walked just as fast to the kitchen. Through the open door, Rossi, Derek, and Spencer watched Y/N grab a glass from the open dishwasher. The water from the tap hit the bottom of the glass harsh, crashing out like a wave of the ocean hitting a cliff. Y/N didn’t seem to care. Their hand dripped water onto the surface as they chugged back some of the drink before returning to the table with a topped-up glass.
“Are you alright?” Rossi inquired, leaning closer to Y/N.
They answered wearily, “Fine, just feeling woozy.���
“You’re a writer?”
“Yeah, you’re a writer too. My mom reads your stuff before bed.”
“Bit of an odd nightcap,” Rossi said with a little chuckle.
Y/N shared that smile for the briefest of moments, replying “You’re telling me.”
From their pocket, they pulled out some painkillers, popping them back with a slug of water then speaking again. “I remember Riley was smaller than me. Still figuring out coordination, but he liked to play chase. I know he was killed; I didn’t find out how until I looked into it last year.”
“Why did you look into it?” Rossi gently probed.
Y/N rubbed two fingers back and forth across their head as they spoke, “I was back here, I felt sick so I went for a walk in the park, and I just remembered him tripping over while trying to tag me. No one ever told me what happened, just that he had to go away. I wanted to know what happened to him.”
“Are you sick often?” Derek asked suddenly, his voice soft to match Rossi. Spencer grimaced at the treatment Y/N was receiving but said nothing.
“Headaches and stomach aches mostly.”
“You get them whenever you come home?”
“I do. Figured I was allergic to something but never figured out what.”
That would have to be a very quick response, like a dog allergy. And coincidental, seeing as the symptoms didn’t start until they saw Spencer.
“Y/N?” called their father, “Can you come here a moment please?”
“May I?”
“Of course,” said Derek and Y/N was out of the room. Derek pivoted in his chair to include Spencer in his theory, “I think they know something, but they don’t know they know it. I think they repressed this memory like you did, Spencer. We should take him to the therapist, see if we can jog his memory.”
“You can’t be serious,” Spencer covered his face with his hands, dragging them down with irritation.
Derek was persistent though, “Spencer, like it or not, Y/N’s linked to this investigation. Put aside your differences for a moment, please.”
Spencer all but squawked, “Put aside my differences?”
“You have brought a lot of bias to this case. Let us at least pursue this lead.”
“Sorry,” Y/N interrupted Spencer’s retort, sitting back at the table, “He needed someone to get unhook the loft door. Mom usually does it.”
“That’s alright.” Rossi waved a hand dismissively. Once Y/N accepted that, he moved in with Derek’s suggestion, “You know, some people have strong physical reactions to memories, trauma. Maybe you’re not getting sick. You’re rejecting something.”
“Rejecting?” repeated Y/N. There was no doubt in their voice, more cautious curiosity.
Derek nodded, “A memory, repressing it, and your body has linked the physical responses to your home. We think it has something to do with this case, and we’d like to see if we can retrieve any memories you might have. Would you be alright to come with us?”
“Yeah,” said Y/N, though they didn’t sound too certain, “Yeah sure.”
The resigned, too tired look on their face, and Spencer felt a tug in his chest. A longing to see Y/N smile like they had when they first entered the house. He’d rather hate someone who was happy than someone who suffered the same as him.
Leaving the house, Spencer took a deep breath of fresh air.
“Spencer?”
He ignored Y/N’s voice for a moment, but he couldn’t disregard Y/N standing in front of him and speaking again, “Spencer, can we talk please?”
“I’m busy,” He said, already walking off as he pretended to call someone, “Hey Garcia.”
 ---> ---> ---> ---> --->
 “Hold onto my hand, use it as an anchor, and squeeze when you feel fear.” Doctor Mohikian accepted Y/N’s hand on her wrist and their silence nod as they lay back on the same couch Spencer had been just hours before.
“I want you to think back to your childhood, back to when you were five. You’re at the park, your parents are on a bench watching nearby to keep you safe. What do you see?”
“Spencer Reid.”
Derek and Rossi glanced at Spencer, who did not react. They kept quiet so that Y/N could immerse themselves in the hypnosis.
“What’s he doing?” Doctor Mohikian continued.
“Teaching me chess.”
 ---> ---> ---> ---> --->
Sat on opposite sides of the table, Spencer and Y/N’s eyes were glued to the chess pieces that were neatly organised between them. Spencer was thinking strategy. He could not say the same for his companion Y/N. They reached a hand out and hovered over the pieces before finally selecting their last knight.
Their tongue clicked as Y/N trotted the piece on the spot.
“What’s this one again?”
“The knight,” Spencer recited, “It moves two spaces up, down, left or right, and another step perpendicular to the first direction.”
“Brave creatures riding into battle,” Y/N narrated before continuing their clip-clopping to its new position, “Pawns in the game of war.”
Spencer didn’t understand how they were coming up with this whilst playing. Well, actually, he did. Because Y/N was clearly not playing to win. They were playing for the best possible story.
“Where do you think this story will end?” Y/N asked.
“I don’t know.”
“You’re lying,” said Y/N, pushing back the sleeves of their white cardigan, “Come on, you can tell me, with your magic powers.”
“It’s not magic. It’s logic.”
“That’s magic to me,”
Narrowing his eyes, Spencer decided that he should give his friend the information they sought: “I see checkmate in fifteen moves.”
“See? Magic! The gift of sight!” crowed Y/N, clapping their hands together. The cardigan sleeves fell back in place as they did so. Spencer felt his cheeks heat up; he dropped his head so he could smile in privacy while Y/N began to decide their next move.
“How’s your mommy today?”
Shrugging, Spencer said, “Better than normal. But that means a bad day is around the corner.”
Y/N nodded solemnly. “Do you want another ice cream? I got more birthday money.”
“No thank you.” Spencer moved the piece but was immediately intercepted by Y/N, “You’re getting better.”
“Fank you.”
“You’ll have to wait longer to beat me though.” And he snatched Y/N’s knight away, just as planned and much to Y/N’s dismay.
A new voice from their left spoke, “Hey you’re pretty good.”
 ---> ---> ---> ---> --->
 Y/N’s grip tightened on Doctor Mohikian’s wrist, “Someone’s with us.”
“Who do you see?” Doctor Mohikian asked patiently.
“A man. He’s asking us if he can watch us play, listen to the story.”
“Do you want him to stay?”
“No,” Y/N flinched, “But Spencer keeps talking to him. The man won’t go away.”
“It’s OK, it’s OK, you’re safe, Y/N.”
Y/N flinched again, this time letting out a whimper, “He’s on the floor.”
“Spencer is?”
“No, the man.”
“What’s he doing on the floor?”
“He’s,” Y/N began panting, their face tensing and body jerking, “I can’t get to him. There’s glass in the way and the ground is shaking.”
“Y/N.”
“I can’t look, I’ll be sick! Whenever I see them, sick.”
“OK, you’re going to wake up in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1!”
Their eyes snapped open with the click of the fingers and Y/N leapt out of Doctor Mohikian’s couch. Their head aimed over the bin by the door and they retched. Nothing came up but their stomach continued to squeeze up
Spencer fidgeted in his seat, trying his best not to look at Y/N. The choice words of the session, three in particular, wrapped around his head.
“Floor”.
Y/N had seen Gary Michaels inside, somewhere that wasn’t the park.
“Glass”.
A window, Y/N was watching what Gary Michaels was doing.
“Sick”.
“Go away! I can’t look at you! You make me feel sick, you and your family!”
“Them”.
It wasn’t just Michaels in the room alone. They had been a witness to his murder.
Derek’s movement to help Y/N took Spencer out of his analysis. Sweaty, Y/N was led back to the couch, the bin between their legs, head lolling forward. Spencer tried to move beside them for questioning, but Y/N winced and began heaving again. He felt that ache in his chest again. He was causing this and nothing he could do would change that. Not until they both knew what happened to Riley and Y/N got help through it.
“What did you see, Y/N?” Derek asked as he replaced Spencer’s spot beside them.
With watering eyes, Y/N looked at Spencer, “The man we played with, he was on the floor. His head – thank you.” They accepted the water from Doctor Mohikian, gulping some back, “It was smashed in.”
The three agents left the room, Doctor Mohikian following after Y/N left to get some air.
“It’s logical to assume that Y/N tied that sickness, that repulsion because of what they thought they saw your mother be involved with, to you and your family,” Doctor Mohikian evaluated.
Interrupting again, Spencer stammered his way through his analysis, “That’s why they avoided me. They associated me with being ill. It’s probably also why they ran away so much; they had to get away from this horrible feeling they had associated with their home.”
Doctor Mohikian shook her head, “We won’t be able to use this in court, I told you when we started.”
Derek’s phone started to ring. As he answered, Spencer somehow managed to slip away for long enough to find Y/N. They were leaning against the ramp’s railing in front of the practice, their body lifting and slumping with each deep breath they took. Against his better judgement, he moved toward them.
“Y/N? Can I have your number?”
The breathing slowed again.
“I need it to call you with an update on the situation as soon as we get one.”
Without looking up, Y/N pulled out their phone and handed it over to Spencer. He punched his number in a new contact, using this time to gather the courage to maybe say something else. The hurt and pain went beyond him now. Y/N was suffering and had been much longer than he had.
“Thank you, Y/N,” Spencer said quietly, hoping that his didn’t add to the illness, “I hope you feel better soon.”
Their head still down, Y/N croaked, “You too, Spencer.”
“Spencer, get over here! We got a match on a print on Michaels’ body!”
 ---> ---> ---> ---> --->
“What makes you think Gary Michaels killed your boy?”
“He admitted it,” Lou Jenkins said, as monotonous as he had been for the last fifteen minutes of the interrogation.
Derek’s quickfire was on Jenkins instantly, “You beat a guy with a baseball bat, he's going to admit to a lot of things. How do you know he was the right guy?”
“I know. He approached another kid in the neighbourhood.”
“And how do you know that?
“I was told by a concerned party.”
“Who? Another parent?”
Jenkins leant back in his chair, “That's all I'm going to say on the subject.”
“Who was it?” Spencer suddenly spoke up.
Caught off guard at his interjection, Jenkins awkwardly parroted himself, “I told you that's all I'm going to say on the sub—"
Reid slammed his hands on the table, getting right up in Lou’s face, “Who was it?”
The door opened, Detective Hyde appeared, “Agent Reid?”
“Do not interfere with this interrogation, detective,” shouted Spencer, “This is not your case anymore!”
Once again, he was cut off. This time, by the arrival of his own mother, Diana, and her admission of guilt: “Spencer, it was me”.
  ---> ---> ---> ---> ---> 
  Of all the things this case had brought him, Spencer least expected to be sitting in a room with his mother and father together for the first time in years. To have Diana explain to him how she was involved in a child’s murder was also up there with the unthinkable.
But he stayed quiet and listened to her confession.
The reveal that she had seen Gary Michaels playing chess with him and Y/N, that she and got a feeling that something was wrong before anything had even happened, opened the story. Lou Jenkins’ involvement was next on the menu. Two days after the chess game, he drove Diana to Michaels’ house, disclosed his history of child abuse, and demanded she leave while he went into the house.
Upon reaching the point where she entered the house, Diana struggled with her words. William reached over and took her hand.
She described seeing Lou with the bat, standing over the body, slipping in the pool of blood, finding Y/N standing in the window and their face, their little face as innocent as the white cardigan that covered their shoulders and absorbed the blood from Diana’s hands as she shook their shoulders.
“And the rest... It's all dark after that.”
William continued for her. Diana came home and brought Y/N with her. Eventually he came to understand what had happened and decided that nobody could ever know.
“You were burning her bloody clothes,” Spencer concluded.
His father nodded, “But the knowing, you can't burn that away. It changes everything.”
“You paid for Y/N to go to therapy.”
William didn’t seem surprised that Spencer knew this, going straight into explaining: “They went into a dissociative fugue state after seeing what Lou had done. When Diana brought them home, they were just stiff. I asked them for their home number, to call their parents, but they started screaming and throwing up. We had to take them to the police station.” He mopped his brow with a handkerchief, “They needed help, but their parents couldn’t afford it. And they didn’t know what had happened. I couldn’t drag another person into this, Spencer.”
“Is this why you left?”
“I tried to keep us together, Spencer. I swear to you, but the weight of that knowledge, it was too much.”
“You could have come back. Could have started over.”
“I didn't know how to take care of you anymore. When I lost that confidence, there was no going back. What's done is done.”
“At least now you know the truth,” Diana made an effort to smile at her son
Choking on his words and the overwhelming remorse he felt, Spencer refused to look at his parents any longer, “I was wrong about everything. I'm sorry.”
And William said something that Spencer had been waiting for, for a long time, “I am, too, Spencer.”
  ---> ---> ---> ---> ---> 
  All of this was repeated when Spencer walked with Y/N through their old park the following day. Filling the final gaps in the memory would hopefully bring some respite to them both. Or at least maybe something to start the recovery process, easing Y/N’s sickness and Spencer’s pain.
“I’m sorry for my behaviour during this case,” Spencer sniffed, “When you said we made you sick, back when we were four, I thought you had seen my mom during one of her episodes and thought she was a freak, like everyone else.”
That stopped Y/N in their tracks, their hands coming up to cover their mouth, their eyes misty, “Oh Spencer, I’m sorry too, I’m so, so sorry I caused you so much pain.”
Spencer’s hands rushed up as if to create belated damage control, “It’s ok! I hurt you too. I made you sick.”
“That wasn’t your fault though.”
“It wasn’t yours either. We were kids.”
Almost pedantic, stropping, like a child again, Y/N moaned, “It’s all been such a waste. We could have been friends all this time!”
“We can be friends now,” Spencer pushed his hands down into his pockets to stop them flailing about anymore. His sentence was phrased more like a question.
One that Y/N gladly answered, “I would like really that.”
Sitting in the reply for a moment, Spencer followed up on his concerns, “How are you feeling? I mean, are you feeling sick again?”
“A bit, but I can handle it.”
Spencer could not see any changes in their behaviour from the day before. So obviously they were lying about that. But he didn’t protest. The lie meant Y/N wanted to stay with him, which was good - Spencer wanted that too.
They kept walking, only in silence for half a minute before Spencer broke it again, “I read your books last night.”
“Yeah?”
“‘The Siege of the Lost Faiths’ in Rogue’s Mask, that was our first game of chess.”
“It had by far the best narrative,” Y/N dragged their shoe a little on the grass before coming to a stop, “Do you still play?”
“All the time.”
They nodded over to where the old chess tables still stood, “Fancy a game before you go?”
Spencer grinned, “Just promise that this is the only setting where we’ll be on conflicting sides from now on.”
“Promise.”
Brushing the debris from the table, they both took their places opposite each other. From Y/N’s bag was revealed a box, spilling their painted chess pieces across the board. Remembering how they had stood in Y/N’s room, Spencer helped to set up the match. They took their seats opposite one another. Y/N was the green side, Spencer the purple.
Spencer moved first. After a second’s deliberation, Y/n moved their pawn.
“Isn’t there a story with this one?” Spencer said, an implicated teasing in his tone despite his shyness.
With an equally bashful eye roll, Y/N started their new story, “First begins the battle with the royals on both sides sending intrepid messengers to meet and pass along their deeds.”
Spencer took Y/N’s pawn. As he lifted their piece away, he spoke quietly, “One not as intrepid as the other.”
A gasp dropped from Y/N’s smile. He had never joined in the narrative telling before, always too taken up in the match to invest in whatever story they spun. 
“He’s not a coward,” They said, still smiling, much to Spencer’s delight, “Prisoner’s dilemma, he just couldn’t trust the other with his life.”
“Did they know each other before this battle?”
“Yes,” Y/N moved a knight across, stealing Spencer’s pawn, “They were brothers who once shared a crib and now they share a grave.”
Throughout the game, Y/N continued the story with Spencer asking questions just to hear them talk more. The maturity of the stories had grown just as Y/N’s voice had. They knuckled their eyes a few times, but they didn’t complain about the headache.
“I know what endings you like,” Spencer moved his rook, “Checkmate in five.”
Y/N didn’t seem to mind that little dig, “This’ll have to be a short story instead then.”
Spencer’s next sentence got away from him, trailing off the closer he got to the end of it, “You could write an anthology series, if we see each other again and play more games.”
Where Spencer’s voice disappeared, Y/N’s returned with invigoration, “That’s not a half bad idea, Spencer.”
The checkmate never came. Y/N diverted the ending into a draw.
“A peace treaty has been forged by the survivors, because too many lives have been lost to justify this violence anymore. If only they realised sooner that no blood had to be shed for peace to rule the lands.” And they smiled at Spencer, clearly chuffed as they leaned back in their chair, “Bit of an upgrade from the horse noises, I’ll say.”
Spencer rotated the purple knight – the illusionist – between his thumb and forefinger, “I liked the horse noises.”
“You should have said during the match! I’d recreate them, for you.”
One by one, the pieces were placed back into their box until the last piece remained in Spencer’s palm: the knight or Soren the Illusionist, distractions and deceptions but he loved the tricks that delighted most of all. Just like Spencer with his magic tricks but a little to the left. The character was always one of Y/N’s favourites. Some solace away from the pain of thinking of who he was based on.
Y/N pushed Spencer’s hand away, closes his fist around it, “Keep him. He was made with you in mind anyway.”
The information sank in and Spencer’s nose wrinkled with the little smile on his face as he cupped the little Illusionist, “I’m Soren?”
Nodding, Y/N confirmed, “You’re Soren.”
“But what about your set though?”
“I can always make and paint another knight,” and Y/N tilted the piece upside down in Spencer’s hand, revealing the signature on the underside, “You and him are the originals, it’s only fair you stay together.”
In a moment of pure instinct and nostalgia, Spencer clicked his tongue as he twisted Soren in time with the noise. Y/N let out a burst of laughter that dragged the air out of Spencer’s chest.
“Hey, do you wanna get dinner tonight?” He said, running out of breath very quickly as a result.
It had a similar effect on Y/N, “I thought you – don’t you have to get back to Virginia?”
“I have time for dinner. For you.”
  ---> ---> ---> ---> --->
 The bookstore was packed but the breath of the patrons was held as one. All eyes were watching the mini stage where a crouching figure lifted their head up slowly. A jump as the tension broke with the figure leaping up to their feet with a bang.
Y/N pushed up the brim of their cap. Snatching a deep green hoodie from the purple trunk – silver constellations painted on the sides – they swung it over their back before picking up the page where they had left off.
“Nasima looked up at Mason and said, ‘Well that was just unnecessary.’”
A burst of laughter shot through the pre-teens in the front row, spreading to the adolescents sitting further back who had grown up with the author’s other works, finally reaching the adults at the back where Spencer was fiddling with his cane. He adjusted the sleeve of his costume absentmindedly. He was just like everyone else in the room: captivated by how Y/N was so immersed in their reading.
They had just mimed kicking down a door, plus sound effects from their mouth. Swapping back and forth between the two conflicting characters arguing with one another, changing between the hoodie and the cap with every other line of dialogue and taking both off for the role of the narrator, it was certainly a workout.
An exaggerated breath was drawn into Y/N’s lungs, flopping over in a melodramatic state, which caused another laugh in the audience.
Spencer’s nose scrunched up as he grinned. He knew this was part of the scene; he’d seen Y/N rehearse this story in their sitting room. It was so much better to share this with an audience, for their reactions to fuel Y/N’s energy.
Y/N finished the short story A Battle of Bent Truths with a flourish, leaving the rest of the anthology for their audience to read in their own time. The kids were up on their feet first. Some of them were jumping up and down as they applauded with the rest of the shop. Y/N gave a big grin as they bowed, sweeping their cap off for extra drama.
There was a book signing and a photographer that followed, and Spencer waited patiently at the end of the queue, thankful that the store allowed him to bring a chair along with him. He was happy to entertain his godson and friends with a few tricks to pass the time.
“Another one please!” Henry jumped up and down when Spencer revealed his card.
A minor commotion arose by the photographer’s backdrop. There was a teenager was crying; she was clutching her copy of Untold Tales of Human Nature. Y/N was holding their shoulders, rubbing gently and speaking softly. Only half paying attention to his next trick, Spencer kept an eye on Y/N as they hugged the teenager, looking near tears themselves.
“Spencer?” J.J tapped him on the shoulder and Spencer realised that Henry was looking a little mad to have lost his godfather’s attention so easily.
“Sorry, Henry, can you pick another card please?”
When they reached the front of the queue, JJ went up first and took Henry and his pals up to see Y/N. They instantly recognised JJ and welcomed her with a tight hug. Henry was delighted to see his favourite babysitter and show them off to his school friends, boasting that they had read to him before today.
“They read me bits for bedtime, Mommy!”
“I know!” JJ tickled his cheek, “I read them to you too.”
“Who do you like better?”
“Mommy,”
Y/N gasped, dropping to their knees which made Spencer wince, “Henry, you wound me!”
Rossi approach next, knowing that once Spencer got to Y/N, they would not be left alone.
“You really know how to captivate an audience,” He kissed them on both cheeks, “Though don’t take offence if I don’t use the same tricks at my readings.”
“Wouldn’t dream of it! Thank you for coming.”
Y/N then caught Spencer’s eye and began meandering over to him with a smile they were desperately trying to stifle. Spencer rose from his chair, meeting Y/N in the middle.
“Hi, Spencer.”
With his free arm, Spencer flaunted his cloak, “Who is Spencer? I’m Soren the Illusionist!”
Giggles from his godson, his godson’s gang, his co-workers and friends, they almost caused Y/N to lose their composure. They held on just long enough to continue the banter.
“Oh, forgive me, you look so much like my boyfriend.”
“Hmmm, he must be very handsome,”
And Y/N burst into peals of laughter, waving their hands about, “OK, stop, stop, stop, I can’t.”
“Hey!” Spencer pretended to take offence, pouting as Y/N brought him into a hug.
“Don’t worry,” They kissed his cheek between giggles, “You are so very handsome.”
“To think you were once sick at the sight of me.”
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